Short Story: ‘The Exact Science of Matrimony’ by O.Henry
03 December 2011
STEVE EMBER: Now, the VOA Special English program AMERICAN STORIES. Our story today is called “The Exact Science of Matrimony.” It was written by O. Henry. Here is Barbara Klein with the story.
(MUSIC)
BARBARA KLEIN: Jeff Peters and Andy Tucker could never be trusted. One day, the two men decided to open a marriage business to make some quick and easy money. The first thing they did was to write an advertisement to be published in newspapers. Their advertisement read like this:
“A charming widow, beautiful and home-loving, would like to remarry. She is only thirty-two years old. She has three thousand dollars in cash and owns valuable property in the country. She would like a poor man with a loving heart. No objection to an older man or to one who is not good-looking. But he needs to be faithful and true, can take care of property and invest money with good judgment. Give address, with details about yourself. Signed: Lonely, care of Peters and Tucker, agents, Cairo, Illinois.”
When they finished writing the ad, Jeff Peters said to Andy Tucker: “So far, so good. And now, where is the lady?”
Andy gave Jeff an unhappy look. “What does a marriage advertisement have to do with a lady?” he asked.
William Sydney Porter, or O. Henry sits for a portrait.
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