gre issue 官方范文(三)_GRE写作

gre issue 官方范文(三)

　　The detailed description of emissions testing is useful; however, the other remedies are not developed fully or persuasively.

　　In some areas the essay suffers from needless repetition.

　　Paragraph six, for example, moves from education to communication and back to education.

　　The conclusion, moreover, adds little, merely repeating earlier statements.

　　The control of grammar and usage is generally competent, but the sentences tend to be choppy.

　　Although most of the ideas are stated clearly, the relationship between the ideas is not always made clear: Also education is very important in making headway.

　　I also believe the government should get more involved in these issues.

　　WORKING TOGETHER FOR EACH OTHER AND THE ENVIRONMENT

　　Our Environment, if we take care of it, it will take care of us.

　　CFCs destroying the ozone layer, hundreds of acres of the rain forest being destroyed daily, smog-infested air to breathe, global warming, world population increasing at an exponential rate, these are but a few of the things that we need to not only think about, but find ways to deal with them.

　　We are not given this world by our ancestors we are borrowing it from our children and our childrens children.

　　We spend so much time trying to fix other countries problems, when we should be incorporating them in working toward solving the environmental issues.