To: He explained that the advertising campaign had been successful, that business had increased more than forty percent, and that additional capital was sorely needed.
3. Attributive Clause
Example 1:
Change: It is a truth that is universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.
To: It is a truth that is universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.
Example 2:
Change: Only a person who is oblivious to the facts of modern life would doubt the need of vocational education today.
To: Only a person oblivious to the facts of modern life would doubt the need of vocational education today.
4. Pronouns
1) Change: He wanted his teachers to think he was above average, as he could have been if he had used it to advantage.
To: He wanted his teachers to think he was above average, as he could have been if he had used his ability to advantage.
2) Change: My sister is a biology teacher, it is a profession I know nothing about.
To: My sister is a biology teacher, but the teaching of biology is a profession I know nothing about.
3) Change: We should have prepared for our examination earlier. It is too late to do it now.
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