6、Original: Another important factor that contributes to the extension of life expectancy is the development of medical science.
Revised: Another imortant factor that contributes to the rise in life expectancy is the development of medical science.
人的寿命的延长可以表示为life extension,但是如果用life expectancy,则要用the increast of 或the rise in life expectancy。
7、Original: the growth of life span.
Revised: the rise in/increase of life span.
Life span意思是寿命,growth指生长,增长,寿命的延长用growth不合适,life span寿命的延长可以用rise in/increase of/extension of.
8、Original: energy saving
Revised: energy efficiency
Energy saving一般作定语,此处名词短语节能最好用energy efficiency。
9、Original: with the increasing complicatedness of the job profile
Revised: with the increasing complexity of the modern jor profile
Complicatedness意思是错综复杂,但是这种错综复杂是有逻辑的;complexity也是复杂的意思,但这种复杂是杂乱无辜的,现代的工作情况用complexity较为合适。
10、Original: Such experience will difinitely be helpful in childrens later life.
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