Then there is the general, all covering apology, which avoids the necessity of identifying a specific act that was particularly hurtful or insulting, and which the person who is apologizing should promise never to do again. Saying Im useless as a parent does not commit a person to any specific improvement.
These pseudo-apologies are used by people who believe saying sorry shows weakness, Parents who wish to teach their children to apologize should see it as a sign of strength, and therefore not resort to these pseudo-apologies.
But even when presented with examples of genuine contrition, children still need
help to become a ware of the complexities of saying sorry. A three-year-old might need help in understanding that other children feel pain just as he does, and that hitting a playmate over the head with a heavy toy requires an apology. A six-year-old might need reminding that spoiling other childrens expectations can require an apology. A 12-year-old might need to be shown that raiding the biscuit tin without asking permission is acceptable, but that borrowing a parents clothes without permission is not.
36. If a mother adds but to an apology, ________.
A) she doesnt feel that she should have apologized
B) she does not realize that the child has been hurt
C) the child may find the apology easier to accept
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