Over the ages, our Chinese people have been looked down upon by foreigners. But now, they are interested in our culture, wearing our clothes. What a change! It shows that we are getting stronger and more influential. It shows that Chinese people really stand up. In this respect, what reasons do we have to look down upon ourselves, our glorious culture and long traditional?
With the reform, China now is becoming a great country. She is going international. Her culture, both traditional and modern, will exercise an impact on the world. Let us work hard and make that possible in the nearest future。
上面的文章虽然分为三段式,但每一个段落差不多都是情绪激昂的口号,没有实质性的内容,更无严密的说理和论述。这样的短文,虽然语法上并不重大差错,但因为内容空洞、缺乏逻辑而不能得到一个好的分数。
我们再来看一下,同样的题目,比较符合英文思维方式和表达方式的作文是怎样的:
⑴The American economic system is organized around a basically private-enterprise,market-oriented economy in which consumers largely determine what shall be produced by spending their money in the marketplace for those goods and services that they want most. ⑵ Private businessmen, striving to make profits, produce these goods and services in competition with other businessmen; and the profit motive, operating under competitive pressures, largely determines how these goods and services are produced. ⑶Thus, in the American economic system it is the demand of individual consumers, coupled with the desire of businessmen to maximize profits and the desire of individuals to maximize their incomes, that together determine what shall be produced and how resources are used to produce it。
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