Most people don't naturally think they reject love. By learning what behaviors we engage in that push away our partner, we can really start to change these behaviors and shift the dynamics of our relationship.

多数人并不认为自己在拒绝爱。要了解我们哪些行为把我们的伴侣推开了，我们才能真正改变这些行为，改变恋爱的现状。

1. Withholding

1、有所保留

As people get closer to each other in relationship, their fears of intimacy can start to turn them against themselves, and in order to create distance, they start to withhold the qualities their partner valued most.

恋爱中，随着关系愈加亲近，惧怕亲密会让人背离自己，为了增加距离感，对于伴侣尤为珍视的品质人们会开始有所克制。

2. Shutting down

2、黯然不语

Our defenses can lead us to become inward or act cold, finding millions of excuses not to interact with someone we love. We stop engaging in loving acts and we may even outright reject our partner by avoiding spending time together.

我们对人设防会导致自己变得封闭内向，表现得冷漠，找出数百种理由不和我们所爱的人交流。我们不再示爱，甚至拒绝我们的伴侣， 避免与之共度时光。

3. Becoming overly critical

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