1. PEOPLE DON'T NOTICE YOUR MISTAKES AS MUCH AS YOU THINK THEY DO.

1. 人们没有你想象中的那么关注你的错误。

Everyone stumbles in life, some more than others. But regardless of the scale of a screw-up, many of us end up feeling as if there's a massive spotlight on our missteps and flaws. It's an incredibly common concern, but Rubin has learned that it's mostly unfounded.

生活中每个人都会出错，有的人错得比别人都多。但每当失足犯错，不管错误是大是小，很多人都会觉得好像有盏聚光灯在照着他们。这种想法极其普遍，但鲁宾已经发现，在大部分情况下这么想是毫无根据的。

"We all feel like everyone's paying attention to us," she says. "But they're paying attention to a lot of other things."

“我们觉得每个人都在关注自己，”她说。“但其实人们还有很多其他事情要关注呢。”

Even someone as well known as Oprah has come to realize this. "Every time somebody would say something about me that wasn't true, I would get so upset," she admits. "It was Quincy Jones who said to me one time this exact law of adulthood. He said, 'Baby, if you knew how little people were thinking about you, you wouldn't even be upset.'"

连奥普拉这样的名人也意识到了这点。“以前每次有人说我的是非，我心理总会很不舒服，”她承认道。“直到有一次昆西•琼斯把这条成年定律告诉了我。他说：‘宝贝，你要是知道别人是几乎不怎么关注你的话，你压根儿就不会觉得不舒服了。’”

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