I also don’t keep score of my achievements, or lack thereof, and if this makes me less competitive (I forget to apply for grants, for example), it also radically reduces my stress.
I no longer judge myself so frequently or harshly. I spend more of my time doing things than reflecting on what I have tackled already or, worse, angsting over what I have not yet done.[19] I’ve relinquished a little control for a little more serenity,[20] which has provided me with a daily emotional payoff.
I have to confess that on occasion I still do count things.
For instance, I am well aware that I am turning 50. Everyone who knows me or meets me in passing knows this, too. George, the liquor-store[21] man. The lady on line at the supermarket. Anyone who sits next to me at the theater.
I have no spiritual life, really, but not counting brings me as close to inner peace as an anxious urban modern mother living in the year 2011 can be. Which in my case is achieved through a simple mathematical equation: not counting = relief.
Vocabulary
1. treadmill: (健身用)踏车,跑步机;footage: (尤指店铺等以平方英尺表示的)面积;saunter: 漫步,闲逛。
2. preternaturally: 不可思议地,异常地;tally: 记录,计算。
3. berate: 痛斥,严责。
4. fouetté: 弗韦泰,指芭蕾舞中一腿抬起在空中急速划圈的单腿转;grands battements: 也作grand battement, 指芭蕾舞中的大踢腿动作。
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