I went to college in Boston and really burned the candle at both ends[17]. While I was running around at night doing comedy clubs, I kept a day job at a car dealership[18]. By the time I got out of school, the comedy money had begun to exceed the day-job money. That’s when I decided, Well, let me give it a shot[19].
Comedy became an all-consuming[20] passion. I played one-nighters[21] in every state of the nation. Whenever I called home, I would exaggerate the accomplishments of other people in show business, because I knew my mother would have like to see me in a steadier line of work[22]. I wanted her to understand the possibilities that lay before me.
Once, when Sylvester Stallone[23] had just signed an enormous movie deal, I called home and said, “You know, Ma, Stallone just got $12 million for ten weeks’ work!”
And she actually said to me, “Yeah? But then what happens those other 42 weeks? What is he going to do if nothing else comes in?”
I spent 300 days a year on the road playing one-nighters, but I had a dream. Not too long ago, I was flipping through[24] some of my early diaries. On a page dated April 28,1972, my 22nd birthday, I found a short entry[25] that said: “Hope to host The Tonight Show.” And finally in late 1986 I was asked to be a guest host[26]. Obviously, this was a great thrill[27].
So on the first day I proudly pulled up to the NBC gate in Burbank. The guard looked at me blankly.
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