You're not alone. A lot of people want to learn the magic, or "the trick" of learning English. But the first thing I always say is: There's no trick.

Nor are there magic potions you can drink and transform yourself overnight.

Oh, no. Don't despair. I'm only joking. There are magic potions.

Of course, there are and aplenty. But these potions are for myself alone. They are not very good to share. The only efficacious part to share is that you can make your own magic potions.

I'm only half-joking. Seriously, you must realize that we don't look at things the same way and therefore we get different pictures. For instance, all I see is good progress from you (and as a result I'm happy). I'm not going to air your first letters in public but I can tell – you write much better now.

You, on the other hand, seem to pay too much attention to your deficiencies and therefore despair (despite all the honest good efforts you've put in along the way).

What you need is perhaps a shift of attention. Shift your attention more to what tiny little progresses you've been making rather than toward the big goals you're going to one day get, such as a big raise in salary. Much in the same way that a raise can be an illusion (you get a raise and you think you're rich. You buy a bigger car and you wind up as poor as you were), our deficiencies are also deceptive, and destructive if we obsess over them.

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