It then transpired that parental controls were impossible to implement. Great toy.
The UK's little darlings now have PSP and DS games machines (whatever they might be) and portable DVD players to keep them amused if they are in the car for more than half an hour.
Are our children now so used to being stimulated for every waking moment by bleeps and flashes that they cannot be satisfied with a 10-minute chat?
On the ferry to our island destination, it was impossible to ignore the gift shop. A $15 rubbishy plastic toy that might be fiddled with for 10 minutes is deemed essential travel baggage.
They're getting fat, too. I witnessed hardly any proper meal eating, it was all chocolate, crisps, milkshakes and whatever else keeps them quiet.
The parents plead poverty. And the families I talk about are not wealthy. They are the average middle-class type with mortgages, credit cards and mounting debt.
I always worry I spoil my own little emperor.
A visit to the UK that had been penciled in to coincide with his cousin's birthday has now been postponed so he doesn't witness the torrents of toys his 4-year-old relative will receive. I wouldn't be able to bear the claims of unfair treatment by his penny-pinching single mother, when he remembers she bought him just five presents on his birthday.
At the risk of sounding like an ancient from a pre-industrial-age world, I can't help asking what happened to guessing and drawing games, and, please don't strike me down with a Star Wars lightsaber, books?
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