00:00:03,530　　我们还有多少时间　　How much time do we have?　　2　　00:00:03,530 --> 00:00:07,330　　倒数5小时37分钟 流星雨开始　　Uh, T-minus five hours, 37 minutes to onset of meteor shower.　　3　　00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:11,430　　我们的位置是北纬34.48°　　西经118.21°　　Okay, our position is 34.48 degrees north, 118.31 west.　　4　　00:00:11,500 --> 00:00:14,000　　这意味着方位角应该是...　　That means the azimuth should be...　　5　　00:00:14,060 --> 00:00:19,730　　相对磁北168.22° 外加仰角49.93°　　168.22 degrees relative to magnetic north with an elevation of 49.93.　　6　　00:00:19,730 --> 00:00:20,690　　有什么了吗　　Anything yet?　　7　　00:00:20,690 --> 00:00:22,680　　我们有信号　　却不能锁定坐标　　Uh, we have a signal, but there's no frame lock.　　8　　00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:24,750　　等等　　现在如何　　Hang on. How about... now?　　9　　00:00:24,810 --> 00:00:26,710　　我们成功了　　We did it.　　10　　00:00:26,780 --> 00:00:30,150　　我们收到西海岸HBO电视台的信号了　　We have the West Coast feed of HBO.　　11　　00:00:30,180 --> 00:00:32,980　　哇　　《真实性爱》　　Ooh, Real Sex.　　12　　00:00:33,050 --> 00:00:34,750　　这可好看了　　每次我看这节目　　Big deal. Every time I watch that show,　　13　　00:00:34,810 --> 00:00:37,050　　都是个老女人往黄瓜上套安全套　　it's old women putting condoms on cucumbers.　　14　　00:00:37,610 --> 00:00:41,410　　那好　　让我们来看看东海岸在播什么　　All right, let's see what's on the East Coast feed.　　15　　00:00:42,850 --> 00:00:44,180　　喔　　是《沙丘》　　Oh, hey. Dune.　　16　　00:00:45,850 --> 00:00:49,750　　不算是个好电影 但看看这美丽的沙漠啊　　Not a great movie, but look at that beautiful desert.　　17　　00:00:51,410 --> 00:00:54,210　　谢尔顿不能来真可惜　　Too bad Sheldon couldn't come with us.　　18　　00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:56,280　　没有他在感觉有点不大对头　　Yeah, it's just not the same without him.　　19　　00:01:04,580 --> 00:01:06,510　　这电影太烂了　　我换回去看《真实性爱》　　Oh, this sucks. I'm switching back to Real Sex.　　20　　00:01:09,610 --> 00:01:12,580　　谢尔顿日志　　Sheldon's log.　　21　　00:01:12,650 --> 00:01:16,380　　星历63345.3　　Stardate 63345.3.　　22　　00:01:16,450 --> 00:01:20,050　　当我的同事们离开 去观测狮子座流星雨时　　While my colleagues are off observing the Leonid meteor shower,　　23　　00:01:20,110 --> 00:01:22,710　　我留守后方完成我关于　　I have remained behind to complete my paper　　24　　00:01:22,780 --> 00:01:25,980　　高激发态大质量弦状态衰变的论文　　on the decays of highly excited massive string states.　　25　　00:01:26,050 --> 00:01:28,050　　尽管我的研究进展顺利　　Although my research is going well,　　26　　00:01:28,110 --> 00:01:31,550　　我确实很想念人类陪伴的温暖　　I do miss the warmth of human companionship.　　27　　00:01:55,460 --> 00:01:57,060　　生活大爆炸　　第三季第八集　　28　　00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:07,010　　晚上好　　暹罗宫　　And good evening to you, Siam Palace.　　29　　00:02:07,080 --> 00:02:08,610　　我是谢尔顿·库珀　　This is Sheldon Cooper.　　30　　00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:10,780　　我今晚要孤独一人进餐　　Yeah, I'm going to be dining alone this evening,　　31　　00:02:10,850 --> 00:02:13,280　　所以我要减少通常的菜单　　so I'll be reducing my usual order.　　32　　00:02:13,350 --> 00:02:17,880　　我的前菜要四分之一份什锦小吃　　I'd like to start with one quarter of the Assorted Appetizers Plate　　33　　00:02:17,950 --> 00:02:21,910　　然后要两人份的金宝贝的一半　　and, uh, one half of the Golden Treasure for two.　　34　　00:02:21,980 --> 00:02:25,280　　看在老天的份上　　在18世纪中页　　Oh, for heaven's sake. In the mid-18th century,　　35　　00:02:25,350 --> 00:02:28,180　　暹罗国王拉玛四世将巨大的帝国　　King Rama IV of Siam divided a huge empire　　36　　00:02:28,250 --> 00:02:31,780　　割让给了欧洲的各大殖民势力 目的是为了保住王位　　amongst the colonial powers of Europe in order to preserve his throne.　　37　　00:02:31,850 --> 00:02:33,750　　你　　他的文化继承者　　理所当然　　Surely, you, his cultural descendant,　　38　　00:02:33,810 --> 00:02:36,280　　也能搞定这些泰式炒面和饺子　　can handle pad Thai and dumplings.　　39　　00:02:36,350 --> 00:02:38,110　　谢尔顿　　救命　　Sheldon, help!　　40　　00:02:38,180 --> 00:02:40,580　　我要挂了　　但是记住我在yelp.com那些　　I need to go-- but you keep in mind　　41　　00:02:40,650 --> 00:02:42,050　　关于一家本地松饼店　　that my sharply worded comments　　42　　00:02:42,110 --> 00:02:44,180　　言辞尖锐的评论　　on Yelp.com recently took down a local muffin store.　　43　　00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:51,180　　佩妮　　佩妮　　佩妮　　Penny. Penny. Penny.　　44　　00:02:51,250 --> 00:02:53,510　　进来　　快点　　Come in! Hurry!　　45　　00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:56,150　　佩妮　　Penny?　　46　　00:02:56,210 --> 00:02:57,510　　我在里面　　I'm back here.　　47　　00:03:02,180 --> 00:03:04,980　　佩妮　　佩妮　　佩妮　　Penny. Penny. Penny.　　48　　00:03:05,050 --> 00:03:08,350　　哦　　老天　　我在浴室里　　Oh, for God's sakes, I'm in the bathroom!　　49　　00:03:08,410 --> 00:03:11,710　　我该挑个更恰当的时机再来吗　　Shall I come back at a better time?　　50　　00:03:11,780 --> 00:03:14,310　　给我进来　　Get in here!　　51　　00:03:14,380 --> 00:03:16,210　　快点　　Hurry!　　52　　00:03:17,610 --> 00:03:19,510　　你敢再敲门试试　　Don't you dare knock!　　53　　00:03:22,710 --> 00:03:24,810　　你好　　Hello.　　54　　00:03:24,810 --> 00:03:28,560　　我在浴缸里滑倒了 我觉得肩膀好像脱臼了　　I slipped in the shower, and I think I dislocated my shoulder.　　55　　00:03:28,710 --> 00:03:29,980　　这不奇怪　　Not surprising.　　56　　00:03:30,050 --> 00:03:33,500　　你没有装防滑垫或者防滑贴纸　　You have no safety mat or adhesive stickers to allow　　57　　00:03:33,500 --> 00:03:36,710　　来抵消浴缸表面的很低的静摩擦系数　　for purchase on a surface with a low coefficient of static friction.　　58　　00:03:36,780 --> 00:03:38,810　　什么　　What?　　59　　00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:41,210　　浴缸都很滑的　　Tubs are slippery.　　60　　00:03:41,280 --> 00:03:43,510　　我知道　　我滑倒了　　I know. I slipped.　　61　　00:03:43,580 --> 00:03:47,610　　我有一个系列的古怪鸭贴纸 贴在我的浴缸底部　　I have a series of whimsical duck stickers on the bottom of my tub.　　62　　00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:51,350　　好吧　　无论如何 你能把水关掉再扶我起来吗　　Yeah, okay, whatever. Will you just turn the water off and help me up?　　63　　00:03:51,650 --> 00:03:53,550　　他们都撑着伞的　　They're holding umbrellas.　　64　　00:03:53,610 --> 00:03:55,280　　什么　　What?　　65　　00:03:55,350 --> 00:03:57,570　　我浴缸里的鸭子　　The ducks in my tub.　　66　　00:03:58,250 --> 00:04:00,910　　它们怪就怪在这些鸭子既没有需要　　They're whimsical because ducks have neither a need for,　　67　　00:04:00,980 --> 00:04:03,280　　也没有能力来使用雨伞　　nor the ability to use, umbrellas.　　68　　00:04:03,350 --> 00:04:05,710　　上帝啊　　我得去急救中心了　　Oh, my God. I got to go to the emergency room.　　69　　00:04:05,780 --> 00:04:08,010　　如果你确定你的右上膊骨　　Well, assuming you're correct that your right humerus　　70　　00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:09,680　　不再固定在肩臼上　　is no longer seated in the glenoid socket,　　71　　00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:12,350　　-我当然认为你该去急救中心　　-你能车我去吗　　- I would certainly think so.　　- Okay, can you drive me?　　72　　00:04:12,410 --> 00:04:13,810　　我不开车的　　I don't drive.　　73　　00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:14,950　　但我开不了　　Well, I can't drive!　　74　　00:04:15,010 --> 00:04:17,810　　看来我们到达了一个僵局　　Well, it seems we've reached an impasse.　　75　　00:04:19,210 --> 00:04:21,380　　我可以帮你叫辆的士或者救护车　　I could call you a cab or an ambulance.　　76　　00:04:21,380 --> 00:04:23,050　　不 不不　　我等不及了　　No, no, no. I can't wait that long.　　77　　00:04:23,110 --> 00:04:24,410　　你必须得帮我　　求你了　　You got to help me, please.　　78　　00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:28,450　　好的　　不能让人说谢尔顿·李·库珀　　All right. Let it never be said that Sheldon Lee Cooper　　79　　00:04:28,510 --> 00:04:30,550　　是个无视陷入困境的少女的人　　ignored the pleas of a damsel in distress.　　80　　00:04:30,610 --> 00:04:32,380　　没人这么说　　快走吧　　No one's saying that. Let's go.　　81　　00:04:32,450 --> 00:04:34,110　　因没买99美分的防滑鸭子　　Well, it does seem rather ironic　　82　　00:04:34,180 --> 00:04:36,280　　而导致两个人都可能死于惨烈的车祸　　that for want of 99-cent adhesive ducks,　　83　　00:04:36,350 --> 00:04:39,410　　这看上去真是非常讽刺　　we both might die in a fiery car crash.　　84　　00:04:41,280 --> 00:04:44,110　　我真希望佩妮不用去工作 她喜欢野营　　I wish Penny didn't have to work. She loves camping.　　85　　00:04:44,180 --> 00:04:45,710　　是啊　　那就太好了　　Yeah, that would have been great.　　86　　00:04:45,780 --> 00:04:47,410　　你和佩妮在帐篷里做爱　　You and Penny having sex in the tent　　87　　00:04:47,510 --> 00:04:50,280　　而我则坐在外面看霍华德拿仙人掌爆菊　　while I sit out here and watch Howard hump a cactus.　　88　　00:04:51,680 --> 00:04:54,910　　好的　　我已经尽力侦查了　　Okay, the best I can tell,　　89　　00:04:54,980 --> 00:04:56,510　　附近还有8个野营地　　there are eight other campsites nearby.　　90　　00:04:56,580 --> 00:04:57,950　　大多都是像我们这样的科学呆子　　Mostly science nerds like us,　　91　　00:04:58,010 --> 00:05:01,080　　不过山脊另一边　　but just over yon ridge are two　　92　　00:05:01,150 --> 00:05:02,980　　有两位不无魅力的中学老师　　not unattractive middle school teachers　　93　　00:05:03,050 --> 00:05:04,780　　浑身散发着绝望主妇的气息　　who reek of desperation.　　94　　00:05:04,850 --> 00:05:06,750　　太好了　　Wow. Wonderful.　　95　　00:05:06,810 --> 00:05:08,480　　-她们多大　　-我不知道　　- How old are they? - I don't know.　　96　　00:05:08,550 --> 00:05:10,150　　50岁　　55岁吧　　50, 55.　　97　　00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:13,050　　更年期妇女　　Oh, menopause.　　98　　00:05:14,250 --> 00:05:16,580　　天然的节育控制　　Nature's birth control.　　99　　00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:17,750　　拜托　　Come on.　　100　　00:05:17,810 --> 00:05:19,510　　你们不会这么饥渴吧　　You guys can't be that hard up.　　101　　00:05:19,580 --> 00:05:21,650　　-我饥渴　　-我也是　　- I am. - Yeah, me, too.　　102　　00:05:22,910 --> 00:05:25,010　　看　　她们还送了点自制曲奇给我们　　Look-- they gave me homemade cookies.　　103　　00:05:25,080 --> 00:05:27,710　　当然会给 老奶奶都这样　　Of course, they did. That's what grandmothers do.　　104　　00:05:27,780 --> 00:05:29,350　　那我们还等什么　　So, what are we waiting for?　　105　　00:05:29,410 --> 00:05:30,450　　悠着点　　Relax.　　106　　00:05:30,510 --> 00:05:34,380　　我说等她们打完盹 我们再过去　　I said we'd stop by a little later after they have their nap.　　107　　00:05:34,450 --> 00:05:35,450　　好主意　　Good idea.　　108　　00:05:35,510 --> 00:05:36,610　　睡醒精力比较足　　They'll be refreshed.　　109　　00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:38,050　　吃曲奇吗　　Cookie?　　110　　00:05:38,110 --> 00:05:39,810　　好　　谢谢　　Yeah. Thank you.　　111　　00:05:43,580 --> 00:05:44,810　　不错啊　　Not bad.　　112　　00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:46,250　　很好吃啊　　Yeah, very tasty.　　113　　00:05:46,310 --> 00:05:47,980　　再说说那些老师的情况　　Well, so tell me more about these teachers.　　114　　00:05:48,050 --> 00:05:49,280　　没什么了　　Not much to tell.　　115　　00:05:49,350 --> 00:05:51,010　　她们开了辆大众车　　They had a VW microbus　　116　　00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:54,050　　穿着扎染的感恩而死乐队T恤　　and were wearing tie-dyed Grateful Dead T-shirts.　　117　　00:05:58,180 --> 00:06:00,210　　美味曲奇　　Good cookies.　　118　　00:06:05,110 --> 00:06:09,010　　这里乱得简直毫无编制体系而言　　I see no organizational system in here whatsoever.　　119　　00:06:10,380 --> 00:06:12,710　　你周一穿什么内裤　　Which panties do you wear on Mondays?　　120　　00:06:12,780 --> 00:06:14,480　　我不要内裤　　I don't need panties.　　121　　00:06:14,550 --> 00:06:16,180　　只要短裤和衬衫　　I just need shorts and a shirt.　　122　　00:06:16,250 --> 00:06:17,480　　妈妈经常跟我说　　My mother always told me　　123　　00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:18,710　　一个人要穿干净内裤　　one should wear clean underpants　　124　　00:06:18,780 --> 00:06:20,380　　以防发生意外　　in case one is in an accident.　　125　　00:06:20,450 --> 00:06:22,480　　我已经发生意外了　　One was already in an accident.　　126　　00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:24,150　　那不表示不会再发生意外　　That doesn't mean one won't be in another,　　127　　00:06:24,210 --> 00:06:25,580　　尤其是我开车的情况下　　especially if I'm driving.　　128　　00:06:25,650 --> 00:06:26,780　　拿衣服　　谢尔顿　　Clothes, Sheldon.　　129　　00:06:26,850 --> 00:06:28,180　　-我要衣服　　-好啦　　- I need clothes! - Okay.　　130　　00:06:28,250 --> 00:06:29,950　　给　　Here.　　131　　00:06:30,010 --> 00:06:31,710　　不会吧　　这条裤子配这件上衣　　Seriously? Those shorts with that top?　　132　　00:06:33,410 --> 00:06:35,380　　好吧　　All right.　　133　　00:06:36,650 --> 00:06:38,280　　不行　　No.　　134　　00:06:40,010 --> 00:06:42,180　　不行　　No.　　135　　00:06:42,250 --> 00:06:43,950　　这件好看　　Oh, that's cute.　　136　　00:06:45,150 --> 00:06:47,350　　一会儿该给你查查有没有脑震荡　　We should have you checked for a concussion.　　137　　00:06:47,410 --> 00:06:49,180　　好了　　Okay.　　138　　00:06:49,250 --> 00:06:51,410　　你得帮我穿衣服　　Now, you got to help me put these on.　　139　　00:06:51,480 --> 00:06:53,410　　-好吧　　-不许看啊　　- All right. - But don't look.　　140　　00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:56,280　　-不许看?　　-我不想让你看我裸体　　- Don't look? - I don't want you to see me naked.　　141　　00:06:56,350 --> 00:06:57,350　　哦　　Oh.　　142　　00:06:57,410 --> 00:06:59,010　　这可以理解　　Well, that's understandable.　　143　　00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:00,880　　你或许会有兴趣知道　　You may be interested to know　　144　　00:07:00,950 --> 00:07:02,450　　禁止看对方　　that a prohibition against looking　　145　　00:07:02,510 --> 00:07:04,680　　早在英雄神话里就有确立　　is well established in heroic mythology.　　146　　00:07:04,750 --> 00:07:07,880　　洛特王和他妻子　　珀尔修斯和美杜莎　　Uh, Lot and his wife, Perseus and Medusa,　　147　　00:07:07,950 --> 00:07:09,710　　-奥菲士和欧律狄刻　　-知道啦　　- Orpheus and Eurydice... - Yeah, great.　　148　　00:07:09,780 --> 00:07:10,780　　他们都看了　　They always look.　　149　　00:07:10,850 --> 00:07:12,650　　结局都很不好　　It never ends well.　　150　　00:07:12,710 --> 00:07:15,250　　好了　　现在帮我把手穿进袖子　　Okay. Now you got help me get my arm into the sleeve.　　151　　00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:16,680　　好的　　Okay.　　152　　00:07:20,310 --> 00:07:21,910　　那是我的手臂吗　　Is that my arm?　　153　　00:07:24,910 --> 00:07:27,950　　感觉不像手臂　　It doesn't feel like an arm.　　154　　00:07:28,010 --> 00:07:30,850　　那你是不是该放手了　　Then, maybe you should let it go.　　155　　00:07:32,680 --> 00:07:34,710　　好滴　　All righty.　　156　　00:07:47,180 --> 00:07:49,980　　星星好漂漂啊　　Stars are pretty, aren't they?　　157　　00:07:51,610 --> 00:07:54,110　　在那高高的地方　　Up above the world so high.　　158　　00:07:54,180 --> 00:07:57,680　　像天上的小钻石　　Like little diamonds in the sky.　　159　　00:07:57,750 --> 00:08:01,010　　太优美了　　兄弟　　That's beautiful, dude.　　160　　00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:03,820　　你应该把这句话写下来 免得被人山寨了　　You should... you should write that down before someone steals it.　　161　　00:08:04,310 --> 00:08:06,350　　流星雨什么时候来　　So, when do the meteors get here?　　162　　00:08:06,410 --> 00:08:08,080　　不是流星雨来这里　　The meteors don't get here.　　163　　00:08:08,150 --> 00:08:10,110　　是地球走到他们的轨道上了　　The Earth is moving into their path.　　164　　00:08:10,180 --> 00:08:12,080　　我能感觉到　　I can feel it.　　165　　00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:17,480　　我能感觉到地球在移动　　I can feel the Earth moving.　　166　　00:08:18,510 --> 00:08:19,750　　移动得太快　　It's moving too fast.　　167　　00:08:19,810 --> 00:08:21,480　　拉杰　　让地球慢点　　Raj, slow it down.　　168　　00:08:30,310 --> 00:08:32,510　　行了　　现在如何　　Okay, how's that?　　169　　00:08:33,550 --> 00:08:34,780　　好多了　　谢谢　　Better. Thanks.　　170　　00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:38,750　　星星多漂漂啊　　Stars are pretty, aren't they?　　171　　00:08:43,180 --> 00:08:44,780　　笑什么　　What's so funny?　　172　　00:08:44,850 --> 00:08:47,780　　笑你的美国口音 你说的话都很傻逼　　It's your American accent. Everything you say sounds stupid.　　173　　00:08:50,310 --> 00:08:52,150　　星星多美啊　　"Stars are pretty, aren't they?"　　174　　00:09:00,650 --> 00:09:03,510　　为准确起见　　我得告诉你　　For the record, I should let you know　　175　　00:09:03,580 --> 00:09:07,180　　这是我第一次开真的汽车　　this is my first time driving an actual motor vehicle.　　176　　00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:10,250　　你有实习驾照吧　　You have your learner's permit, right?　　177　　00:09:10,310 --> 00:09:11,680　　有　　我还在　　Yes, and I have logged　　178　　00:09:11,750 --> 00:09:14,250　　模拟装置上开了很长时间　　a considerable number of hours on a simulator.　　179　　00:09:14,310 --> 00:09:16,950　　-那就行　　-但效果不太好　　- Good. - Didn't work out well.　　180　　00:09:17,010 --> 00:09:18,950　　-行了　　能开了吗　　-等一下　　- All right, can we please go? - One moment.　　181　　00:09:19,010 --> 00:09:23,080　　驾驶培训书里说 侧视镜的正确角度是　　According to my driver's ed book, the side mirror is properly adjusted　　182　　00:09:23,150 --> 00:09:26,950　　调到能在镜子的右下角 看到部分门把手　　when the driver's door handle is visible in the lower right corner.　　183　　00:09:27,010 --> 00:09:28,050　　看到门拉手了　　There's the handle.　　184　　00:09:28,110 --> 00:09:29,450　　不不　　太过了　　Oh, no, too far.　　185　　00:09:29,510 --> 00:09:32,180　　往回一点点　　Bringing it back.　　186　　00:09:32,250 --> 00:09:33,550　　这才正好　　Optimized.　　187　　00:09:33,610 --> 00:09:37,380　　好　　调整副驾驶座 后视镜的调节器呢　　Now, where is the switch to adjust the passenger side mirror?　　188　　00:09:37,450 --> 00:09:39,310　　就在这里　　It's right there.　　189　　00:09:40,780 --> 00:09:43,150　　副驾驶座的后视镜在哪儿呢　　Where is the passenger side mirror?　　190　　00:09:44,180 --> 00:09:46,350　　在好莱坞的停车场时被撞掉了　　In a parking lot in Hollywood.　　191　　00:09:46,410 --> 00:09:48,610　　-行行好　　我们能走了吗　　-好　　- Now, can we please go? - Yes.　　192　　00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:50,980　　先等我调整好座椅　　As soon as I adjust my seat.　　193　　00:10:00,180 --> 00:10:03,210　　噢　　老天 我又得重来一次　　Oh, dear. I'm going to have to start again.　　194　　00:10:12,410 --> 00:10:14,410　　如果我会说兔子的语言　　If I could speak the language of rabbits,　　195　　00:10:14,410 --> 00:10:18,310　　那就太美妙了　　我将成为兔王　　that will be amazed, I will be their king.　　196　　00:10:19,710 --> 00:10:22,580　　我讨厌我的名字　　I hate my name.　　197　　00:10:24,450 --> 00:10:26,910　　读起来像个呆子　　It has "nerd" in it.　　198　　00:10:29,580 --> 00:10:32,980　　莱呆子　　Len-nerd.　　199　　00:10:33,050 --> 00:10:36,350　　我的第一次是和我的表姐珍妮　　I lost my virginity to my cousin Jeanie.　　200　　00:10:38,780 --> 00:10:41,050　　我会仁慈地对待我的兔民们　　I would be kind to my rabbit subjects.　　201　　00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:45,580　　当然只是开始而已　　At first.　　202　　00:10:45,650 --> 00:10:48,310　　知道什么才叫酷名吗　　You know what's a cool name?　　203　　00:10:48,380 --> 00:10:50,850　　安杰洛　　Angelo.　　204　　00:10:50,910 --> 00:10:54,250　　有天使又有洁露果子冻　　That has angel and Jell-O in it.　　205　　00:10:55,450 --> 00:10:57,380　　那是在我穆雷舅舅的葬礼上　　It was my Uncle Murray's funeral.　　206　　00:10:57,450 --> 00:10:59,880　　我们在芭芭拉阿姨的房子后面　　We were all back at my Aunt Barbara's house.　　207　　00:10:59,950 --> 00:11:02,350　　透过一条腌鲱鱼　　我们四目相接　　Our eyes locked over the pickled herring.　　208　　00:11:02,410 --> 00:11:04,410　　我们本来没想着会发生关系的　　We never meant for it to happen.　　209　　00:11:05,910 --> 00:11:08,980　　一天　　我为法国总统举办了一场盛大舞会　　One day, I hold a great ball for the President of France,　　210　　00:11:09,050 --> 00:11:11,180　　但是兔民们　　因为憎恨我而没来捧场　　but the rabbits-- they hate me and don't come.　　211　　00:11:11,250 --> 00:11:14,150　　我极为尴尬　　于是我逼它们眼睁睁地看着　　I am embarrassed, so I eat all the lettuce in the world　　212　　00:11:14,210 --> 00:11:16,210　　我吃光世界上所有的莴苣　　and make them watch.　　213　　00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:19,510　　别人可以昵称我安吉　　People could call me Angie.　　214　　00:11:21,710 --> 00:11:24,780　　(史泰龙状)　　哟　　安吉　　最近咋样　　(la Sylvester Stallone): Yo, Angie, how's it goin'?　　215　　00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:27,950　　直到如今　　每次一看到腌鲱鱼　　To this day, I can't look at pickled herring　　216　　00:11:28,010 --> 00:11:31,010　　就会忍不住尴尬性奋　　without being aroused and ashamed.　　217　　00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:34,610　　噢　　珍妮阿姐　　Oh! Cousin Jeanie.　　218　　00:11:39,610 --> 00:11:42,310　　你就不能开快点吗　　Could you please drive a little faster?　　219　　00:11:42,380 --> 00:11:45,110　　我觉得已经够快了　　Oh, I think we're going sufficiently fast.　　220　　00:11:46,780 --> 00:11:48,710　　什么情况　　What's that?　　221　　00:11:48,780 --> 00:11:50,650　　没事　　引擎时不时会这样　　Nothing. The engine does that sometimes.　　222　　00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:51,810　　没事才怪　　It can't be nothing.　　223　　00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:52,980　　检查引擎指示灯都亮了　　The check engine light is on.　　224　　00:11:53,050 --> 00:11:54,380　　我们得去服务站　　We need to find a service station.　　225　　00:11:54,450 --> 00:11:56,710　　自我买回这辆车　　这灯就一直亮着　　No. The light has been on since I bought the car.　　226　　00:11:56,780 --> 00:12:00,880　　那就更应该去了 趁这车爆炸之前　　找维修师来处理　　All the more reason to consult with a mechanic before it explodes.　　227　　00:12:00,950 --> 00:12:02,180　　爆炸个鬼啊　　It's not going to explode.　　228　　00:12:02,250 --> 00:12:03,480　　快开车　　Just keep driving.　　229　　00:12:03,550 --> 00:12:06,750　　曲速前进　　史波克长官　　Warp speed ahead, Mr. Spock.　　230　　00:12:06,810 --> 00:12:10,850　　史波克不是企业号的驾驶员　　Mr. Spock did not pilot the Enterprise.　　231　　00:12:10,910 --> 00:12:13,580　　他是科学官　　还有我保证　　He was the science officer, and I guarantee you that　　232　　00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:16,180　　只要他看到企业号的检查引擎指示灯　　if he ever saw the Enterprise's check engine light blinking,　　233　　00:12:16,250 --> 00:12:18,980　　闪那么一下　　他会立刻下令靠边停　　he would pull the ship over immediately.　　234　　00:12:19,050 --> 00:12:22,410　　老天　　我的手臂完了　　Oh, God, I'm gonna lose the arm.　　235　　00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:25,710　　红灯 先松开油门　　Oh, well, red light. Release accelerator　　236　　00:12:25,710 --> 00:12:29,910　　然后要慢慢地踩刹车　　and slowly apply... the... brake.　　237　　00:12:32,410 --> 00:12:34,510　　搞定　　Nailed it.　　238　　00:12:37,380 --> 00:12:40,610　　趁现在空着　　能问你个问题吗　　While we have a moment, may I ask you a question?　　239　　00:12:40,680 --> 00:12:42,010　　说　　What?　　240　　00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,380　　你为什么在右屁股上　　Why do you have the Chinese character for soup　　241　　00:12:44,450 --> 00:12:46,480　　纹了个中国字"汤"的纹身　　tattooed on your right buttock?　　242　　00:12:46,550 --> 00:12:48,180　　那不是"汤"　　It's not soup.　　243　　00:12:48,250 --> 00:12:49,480　　是"勇"　　It's courage.　　244　　00:12:49,550 --> 00:12:50,950　　才不是　　No, it isn't.　　245　　00:12:51,010 --> 00:12:53,180　　但我猜想　　要表现出对汤的热忱　　But I suppose it does take courage　　246　　00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:57,010　　还真是需要不少勇气　　to demonstrate that kind of commitment to soup.　　247　　00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:58,950　　你怎么会看到　　How did you see it?　　248　　00:12:59,010 --> 00:13:00,450　　你说了不看的　　You said you wouldn't look.　　249　　00:13:00,510 --> 00:13:04,910　　不好意思 正如我所说　　是英雄　　就偷窥　　Sorry. As I told you, the hero always peeks.　　250　　00:13:13,950 --> 00:13:15,110　　找到了吗　　Anything?　　251　　00:13:15,180 --> 00:13:17,680　　没有　　你吃掉了最后一个布丁　　No. That was the last pudding cup.　　252　　00:13:17,750 --> 00:13:19,850　　不　　No!　　253　　00:13:19,910 --> 00:13:22,150　　史吉牌牛肉小吃呢(美国牛肉小吃品牌)　　What about Slim Jims?　　254　　00:13:22,210 --> 00:13:25,710　　他刚才就着布丁吃光了　　忘了吗　　That's what he used to eat his pudding, remember?　　255　　00:13:25,780 --> 00:13:30,010　　没错　　太美味了　　Right. That was so good!　　256　　00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:34,010　　甜甜肉肉的混合口感真棒　　Sweety and meaty at the same time.　　257　　00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:36,310　　等等　　你是说　　Wait. Wait, wait. So you're saying　　258　　00:13:36,380 --> 00:13:37,710　　我们吃光食物了吗　　we're out of food?　　259　　00:13:37,780 --> 00:13:40,350　　里面只剩下蓝色冰袋了　　The only thing in here are blue ice packs.　　260　　00:13:40,410 --> 00:13:42,450　　虽然深知它们有毒　　I know they're poison,　　261　　00:13:42,510 --> 00:13:46,410　　但还是像极了美味诱人的吸的冻　　but they look like big, yummy otter pops.　　262　　00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:49,550　　老天爷　　我饿死了　　Oh, God, I am so hungry.　　263　　00:13:49,610 --> 00:13:50,750　　我也是　　Me, too.　　264　　00:13:50,810 --> 00:13:54,310　　再看看我们还有布丁没　　Check and see if we have any more pudding.　　265　　00:13:56,250 --> 00:13:58,450　　好吧　　Okay.　　266　　00:14:00,910 --> 00:14:03,280　　好吧　　也没必要冲我吼吧　　All right, there's no need to bark at me.　　267　　00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:08,750　　那位莫名暴躁的 接待护士说　　According to the inexplicably irritable nurse behind the desk,　　268　　00:14:08,750 --> 00:14:11,050　　你排在那个声称自己 有心脏病的男人后面　　you'll be seen after the man who claims to be having a heart attack,　　269　　00:14:11,110 --> 00:14:12,610　　但在我看来　　他健康得很　　but appears to be well enough　　270　　00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:15,410　　还能在他的iPhone上玩涂鸦跳跃呢　　to play Doodle Jump on his iPhone.　　271　　00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:18,280　　我们得先填表格　　We have to fill these out.　　272　　00:14:19,650 --> 00:14:22,080　　"请描述病情和伤情情况"　　"Describe illness or injury."　　273　　00:14:22,380 --> 00:14:24,150　　肩膀脱臼　　I dislocated my shoulder.　　274　　00:14:24,150 --> 00:14:25,810　　好吧　　All right.　　275　　00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:28,580　　发生意外的原因　　And how did the accident occur?　　276　　00:14:28,650 --> 00:14:31,050　　你不是已经知道了吗　　You already know that.　　277　　00:14:31,110 --> 00:14:33,110　　"意外原因"　　"Cause of accident."　　278　　00:14:33,180 --> 00:14:35,280　　"没有防滑小鸭"　　"Lack of adhesive ducks."　　279　　00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:40,050　　好了　　病史　　Okay, medical history.　　280　　00:14:40,110 --> 00:14:42,050　　你有过糖尿病史吗　　"Have you ever been diagnosed with diabetes?"　　281　　00:14:42,110 --> 00:14:43,650　　-没有　　-肾病呢　　- No. - Kidney disease?　　282　　00:14:43,710 --> 00:14:45,380　　-没有　　-偏头痛　　- No. - Migraines?　　283　　00:14:45,450 --> 00:14:47,450　　马上就有了　　Getting one.　　284　　00:14:48,450 --> 00:14:50,050　　-你目前怀有身孕吗　　-没有　　- Are you currently pregnant? - No.　　285　　00:14:50,110 --> 00:14:52,550　　确定吗　　你看起来可有点肥　　Are you sure? You look a bit puffy.　　286　　00:14:54,680 --> 00:14:56,780　　偏头痛那里改成"是"　　Change migraine to yes.　　287　　00:14:58,050 --> 00:15:00,010　　你上次生理期是什么时候　　"When was your last menstrual period?"　　288　　00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:01,650　　转下个问题　　Oh. Next question.　　289　　00:15:01,710 --> 00:15:03,780　　我就写　　“生理期中”　　I'll put, "In progress."　　290　　00:15:05,710 --> 00:15:08,180　　好了　　下面是精神疾病的问题　　Okay, moving to psychiatric disorders.　　291　　00:15:08,250 --> 00:15:10,010　　列出所有重大行为方面的病症　　"List all major behavioral diagnoses,　　292　　00:15:10,080 --> 00:15:12,080　　例如沮丧　　焦虑等等　　"e.g. depression, anxiety, etcetera."　　293　　00:15:12,150 --> 00:15:14,510　　天哪　　这些跟我这该死的肩膀　　Oh, my God, what the hell does this　　294　　00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:15,980　　又有什么该死的关系　　have to do with my stupid shoulder?!　　295　　00:15:16,050 --> 00:15:19,280　　是否有以下精神疾病发作史　　"Episodes of sub psychotic rage."　　296　　00:15:20,810 --> 00:15:22,210　　干　　Ass.　　297　　00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,280　　可能患有吐雷氏症　　"Possible Tourette's."　　298　　00:15:25,680 --> 00:15:29,910　　好了　　是否有痣斑　　病变或其他皮肤问题　　All right. "Moles, lesions or other skin conditions."　　299　　00:15:29,980 --> 00:15:32,510　　右边屁股纹了个"汤"字　　"Soup tattoo on right buttock."　　300　　00:15:32,580 --> 00:15:33,910　　谢尔顿　　谢尔顿　　听我说　　Hey, Sheldon, Sheldon, look,　　301　　00:15:33,980 --> 00:15:36,280　　我饱受惊吓　　而且疼得厉害　　I am scared and in a lot of pain.　　302　　00:15:36,350 --> 00:15:39,280　　可不可以请你别这么自我　　Could you please take a break from being you for　　303　　00:15:39,350 --> 00:15:41,210　　让我缓口气　　再试着...　　just a minute and try being--　　304　　00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:44,110　　怎么说呢　　安慰一下我　　I don't know-- comforting?　　305　　00:15:44,180 --> 00:15:46,980　　抱歉　　I'm sorry.　　306　　00:15:48,010 --> 00:15:50,150　　好了好了　　There, there.　　307　　00:15:51,410 --> 00:15:53,410　　一切都会好起来的　　Everything's going to be fine.　　308　　00:16:01,550 --> 00:16:03,550　　有我谢尔顿在　　Sheldon's here.　　309　　00:16:10,050 --> 00:16:14,210　　谢谢　　这样好多了　　Thanks. That's much better.　　310　　00:16:15,580 --> 00:16:17,850　　我饿死啦　　Oh, I'm so hungry!　　311　　00:16:17,910 --> 00:16:19,310　　你闭嘴吧　　Will you shut up?　　312　　00:16:19,380 --> 00:16:21,510　　我们都饿死了　　We're all hungry.　　313　　00:16:21,580 --> 00:16:25,210　　好了　　我们的抢劫目标是 东边那个童子军训练营地　　Okay, our objective is the Boy Scout campsite to the east.　　314　　00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:27,310　　很好下手 手不能提的童军教练　　Easy target. Big doughy scout master,　　315　　00:16:27,310 --> 00:16:29,680　　加上几个童军 大多是幼童军　　couple of Cubs, mostly WeBeLos.　　316　　00:16:29,750 --> 00:16:31,050　　具体抢啥东西呢　　What kind of score we looking at?　　317　　00:16:31,110 --> 00:16:34,600　　热狗　　面包　　烤巧克力夹心饼 那整个一便利商店嘛　　Hot dogs, Buns, S'mores. I mean, it's a freaking 7-11.　　318　　00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:37,080　　好了　　大家都带上手电　　All right,everyone grab flashlights.　　319　　00:16:39,880 --> 00:16:42,180　　天哪　　会是那个吗　　Oh, my God, could it be?　　320　　00:16:42,250 --> 00:16:43,480　　太好了　　Yes!　　321　　00:16:43,550 --> 00:16:46,380　　我妈妈在我包里放了鸡胸肉"爱心便当"　　My mother put an "I love you" brisket in my backpack.　　322　　00:16:46,450 --> 00:16:47,380　　快　　拿叉子　　Quick, get forks.　　323　　00:16:47,450 --> 00:16:48,780　　不需要拿叉子　　You don't need forks.　　324　　00:16:48,850 --> 00:16:50,550　　多嫩的鸡胸肉啊　　用手一撕就行了　　It's so tender, it falls apart in your hands.　　325　　00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:52,610　　他说的没错　　He's right.　　326　　00:17:01,350 --> 00:17:03,510　　我觉得我们好像忘了啥重要的事　　I feel like we're forgetting something important.　　327　　00:17:03,580 --> 00:17:05,580　　我也是　　但是什么捏　　Me, too. But what?　　328　　00:17:07,810 --> 00:17:12,610　　也许是忘" type="audio/mpeg" />-->