1．Say thanks and think it over.

　　Don't allow people to bully you into making quick decisions.You may feel uncomfortable，hate the other person，and make some anger towards yourself.__30__ Give them a time or date that you'll follow up with them.

　　2．Three breaths and two questions.

　　If we are in the habit of saying yes out of thinking，every question can cause stress.__31__ Then ask yourself these two questions：Am I able to? Do I want to? Just because we're able to do something it doesn't mean we should or that we need to.When we do things out of obligation it feels like a chore.When we do things out of love，they feel like a joy.

　　3．__32__

　　The actual saying no can be the hardest step because your mind's program may tell you that you're selfish or you're a bad person for saying no.This is not true.You are saying no because you value yourself，your time，and your energy.Saying no like this：I appreciate you thinking of me to watch your dog but unfortunately I'm not able to this weekend.” You can offer other dates that might work.

　　4．Simply say no with a smile.

　　__33__ When you're able to say no easily and without guilt，you might even find that you are more willing to volunteer and/or participate because when you do，it will be out of joy，not obligation.

　　A．What will they think if I say no?

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