I asked my husband if he would be willing to set up a time each week to talk about our finances and develop a plan for getting rid of our credit card debt. My husband said he would be willing to do this. Admittedly, he was skeptical — but willing.

　　We came to refer to our weekly meetings as our Financial Dates. We didn’t really have a clue as to what we were doing. All we knew was that we needed to give our finances serious attention. Some Dates were filled with tense conversations. Other Dates were filled with laughter, joy and creativity. However, we kept showing up for our Dates and we never gave up. What started out as a means for survival became a powerful connecting thread in our relationship. Something shifted within us.

　　Instead of our finances becoming a source of divisive tension that pulled us apart, they became

　　the glue that held us together as we became a unified team.

　　I still recall the day that we excitedly crossed off our last credit card payment on the chart we had created. We had finally arrived. We were free. We had been given wings to fly.

　　Now, whenever I feel huge stress I ask myself, “How am I contributing to what is happening right now?” This gives me the ultimate power to take action. Even though my husband and I don’t have any guarantee against future challenges, I am left with something deep within that is unshakable and that can never be taken away — the memory of our past successes and the power to integrate (整合) these lessons in my day-to-day life.

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