My mother usually drove me to the riding events,but on this day,my father planned to drop us off at the fairgrounds with the horse trailer(拖车).

　　Although we never discussed it,my father’s struggle with alcoholism had become the silent center of our family life.My mother was paralyzed with fear and indecision.Her salary as a part-time nurse couldn’t possibly support four children.No one talked about alcoholism in those days,and it was my family’s secret.

　　We climbed on the trailer and my father pulled out of our driveway and headed toward the fairgrounds,picking up speed once we hit the main road.It wasn’t until we felt a big bump that I realized the trailer was out of control.The dream of my riding winner disappeared.Tonka lay on

　　the floor,completely still.No words were possible.I knew he was dead.

　　Suddenly a man appeared.“Are you all right?”he asked.“Yes,”I answered,although I knew that nothing was all right.“Sit here on the grass,”he said.He bent down to look into the trailer.Tonka remained still.He touched Tonka and then turned to face me.“He is going to be OK.He has just been knocked unconscious.” He rubbed Tonka’s cheeks and gently pulled his ears.Tonka rose to his feet.

　　Our father was talking to a police officer.He was upset and in pain and took little notice of me.I looked back;the man was gone.

　　I never forgot him.He gave me strength and a sense of hope in a dark and frightening moment.

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