(2017·深圳市高三一模)It's a strange phenomenon how difficult people find it to love themselves.One would think it is the easiest thing in the world,because we're constantly concerned with ourselves.We're always interested in how much we can get,how well we can perform,how comfortable we can be.So with all that,why is it so difficult to actually love oneself?
Loving oneself certainly doesn't mean pleasing oneself without considering others.But sadly,loving is an attitude towards oneself that most people don't have.That's because they know quite a few things in themselves are not so attractive to make them feel proud.Everybody has many attitudes,reactions,likes and dislikes which they think they would be better off without.Judgment is made and then one likes one's positive attitudes or one dislikes the others.In that case,we will ignore those aspects of oneself which one is not pleased with.One doesn't want to know about them or acknowledge them,which is the obstacle to growth.Since the weaknesses exist and cannot be rid of,one can never take pride in himself or love himself.
Another unskillful way is to dislike that part of oneself which appears negative.With that comes fear and very often aggression.If one wants to deal with oneself in a balanced way,it's not useful to pretend that the unpleasant part doesn't exist.We've all come across people like that,who are too sweet to be true.Blaming oneself doesn't work either,which makes matters twice as bad as they were before.In the above situations,one transfers one's own reactions to other people.One blames others for their deficiencies (不足之处),real or imagined,or one doesn't see them as ordinary human beings.
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