4.习作注意运用了表达法。Half of the students are fond of reading newspapers or various magazines. (4)The percentage of students who choose to read literary books is only 10, which is the smallest. (5)The rest of the students like reading others.
5.习作在谈谈看法(至少两点)时,咳嗽得很恰到好处地紧紧围绕图表2中所反映的(家长方面的和学
校方面的)两个原因来谈谈自己的看法,增加了文章的亮点。
【习作的缺点】
1.句型的运用上有致命的错误。这也许是该习作为什么被扣分的最主要的原因。
如:(3)There is 20% students usually read cartoons.按照作者的基本功,根本就不应该出现这种中国学生在书面表达中经常出现的典型错误。应改成:There are 20% students who usually read cartoons.或There are 20% students usually reading cartoons.
再如:(9)… and there isn’t enough books available. 按照作者的基本功,根本就不应该出现这样的低级错误。应改成:… and there aren’t enough books available.
2.因为有重复,所以表达显得过于冗长,这也许是该习作为什么被扣分的另一个主要原因。
如:“(6)According to these statistics, it’s easy for us to find the fact that the number of those who choose to read literary books is small.”与上文的“(4)The percentage of students who choose to read literary books is only 10, which is the smallest.”就是重复的。再说与上文联系的也不紧密。似应改成“Why are so many students unwilling to read literary works?”或“Why are so few students who choose to read literary works?”。这样一改“(7)But what causes this phenomenon?According to Chart 2”,然后叙述原因,这样显得紧奏又顺理成章。
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