【习作的缺点】
2.某些句型的运用上有错误
如:(5)However, in the second picture, an oil bottle fell down and the mother criticized angrily the little boy didn’t straighten the bottle up. 动词 criticize”后面接 that 从句However, in the second picture, an oil bottle fell down and seeing the little boy didn’t straighten it up, the mother criticized him angrily”
3.某些句与句之间缺乏必要的连贯
【修改后的习作】
Education, which has always been a hot topic, plays a very important role in today’s world .But not every parent knows how to educate their children correctly.
As is shown in the first picture, when a little girl fell down, a little boy wanted to help her. But his mother prevented him and said, “You can’t, otherwise someone else would say that it was you that knocked her off.” However, in the second picture, an oil bottle fell down but the little boy didn’t straighten it. So the mother criticized him angrily when he yelled, ‘If I had done that, you would say the bottle was brought down by me.’ Hearing his explanation, the mother was shocked.
From my point of view, what the mother did was wrong. As we all know, parents are children’s first teachers. Therefore, I think parents should not only care for their children's health, but their minds. In addition, they should let their children know it's a pleasure to help others who are in trouble.
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