Not only did I never have a brother, but also I had no friendships like theirs. My sister was old enough to help take care of me, so she was more a mother than a playmate, and I was more a pest than a friend. A brother would have been wonderful, but it was not in the family planning.
Now I finally live with brothers, my sons, Tonio and Sam. I am watching them build the kind of relationship that I once dreamed about. They go to bed together. When one comes into our bed after a nightmare, my wife and I know that before morning his brother will follow.
Sam manages the world with more ease than his elder brother, whose frustrations often bring him to tears. With a sincere “Smile, Tonio,” Sam is the one who comforts him. Tonio, on the other hand, has stopped playing with boys at his age who don’t like playing with Sam. They are always backing each other up.
I don’t know what kind of relationship they will have when they grow up. Parents always want their children to have what they never could. I want them to have each other. So I imagine them going to the same college, marrying sisters and living on the same block.
That’s why I was so worried the day Tonio started kindergarten. I felt that I would lose something too. As we headed for school that morning, both boys seemed relaxed, as if neither had any idea that the day was going to be different, that starting then, Tonio would be leaving behind his brother, his best friend, his right arm.
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