I still don’t know the answer to this, but what I’ve learned so far is: Guilt is a feeling begging to be an action. It doesn’t want you to feel bad. It wants you to

　　46

　　.

　　So I do. I try to act in a way that turns guilt into honor. To honor my brother, I try to see everything he can’t. To honor my

　　47

　　husband, I try to be alive in ways he used to be. I delight in family, friends, people

　　48

　　, and all the crazy things they do. And I say “yes” to every chance I get to learn and be alive.

　　But it’s a lot more

　　49

　　than feeling bad. Instead of wallowing in (沉溺于) guilt, I see for someone who will never see. And I live well for someone who is no longer alive. I do it for them. ButI do it for me. It’s not easy to see the world with all its glories and faults, or to be alive in all the ways life demands.

　　36. A. bit

　　B. hurt

　　C. beat

　　D. hit

　　37. A. express

　　B. show

　　C. appear

　　D. win

　　38. A. carrying

　　B. taking

　　C. loading

　　D. getting

　　39. A. could

　　B. might

　　C. should

　　D. would

　　40. A shone

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