Tears wet the bed. Can't I have my own privacy? Is privacy synonymous with "furtive"?

我并不认为那些不属于教学范围的书就是“野书”、“闲书”，它们给了我很多很多。

I don't think those books that don't belong to the scope of teaching are "wild books" and "idle books". They give me a lot.

1月的日记写着：

The diary of January reads:

理发店里“人头济济”，妈妈要我“灵活机动”地插队，我不愿意，总要有个先来后到呀！妈妈直着嗓门说：“看看你，在外边那么没用，不就占个位子吗！”当时，我多想逃出门去啊！大家都望过来，妈妈却还自以为得意。我不吭声，她竟接着数落：“有这等的工夫，还不如回家做作业呢！”是的，我是没有勇气为了抢个先而与别人争，那是因为我有自尊。

The barber shop is full of people. My mother wants me to jump in the line flexibly. I don't want to. I have to come first and come later! Mom said in a straight voice, "look at you. It's useless outside. Don't you just take a seat!" At that time, how I wanted to escape from the door! Everyone looked over, but my mother thought she was proud. I didn't say a word, but she went on and said, "it's better to go home and do homework with such time!" Yes, I don't have the courage to compete with others for the first place. That's because I have self-esteem.

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