I got 35 points in the exam, maybe it was "deserved", because since the second year of junior high school, I didn't learn at all. In class, I just talk to others, do nothing, don't listen to anything, and hold the mentality of "I can't do the problem even if I understand". Facing mathematics, I don't know why I do it. I used to like math, but now I think it's funny and sad I hate my depravity, because it devours my confidence in learning, so, in the face of that bloody, poor 35 points, I really have nothing to say. There were times when I really wanted to call on you to scold me. But when I thought that I was a poor student, I had no courage. When I thought that you would turn a blind eye to my "depravity" and "carelessness", I lost confidence in myself and said in my heart, "forget it, it's a poor student, and the teacher has saved the strength to criticize me." At that moment, I didn't know what kind of Psychology I was to you - fear, awe? Hate, or hate? I don't know. Of course, I don't know. Sometimes I feel like I should reflect on myself. I think: if only you could criticize me for two sentences! Maybe I can cheer up. But I immediately thought, "no way, because I'm a poor student now." I don't know. Are poor students really so annoying and hopeless?
我曾想放弃数学的学习。后来又意识到自己的过错,想弥补;但一想到您对我的冷淡,就又心灰意冷了。甚至看到您批评其他同学时,我十分羡慕和嫉妒。因为,您至少愿意批评他们,难道我连被您批评的资格也没有吗?
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