修改后:Students should be encouraged to take part-time job because it will benefit students and their family, even the society as a whole。
A large number of people think that they had completed their education when they finished their schooling. Not realizing that a persons education is a most important aspect of his life。
点评:分词引起的破句。当分词出现在一个短语或句子的开头时常常会产生破句,而这样的破句往往缺少主语或谓语动词的一部分。
修改后:A large number of people think that they had completed their education when they finished their schooling. They fail to realize that a persons education is a most important aspect of his life。
International travel has given rise to large numbers of employment opportunities. For example, retail, hospitality and transportation。
点评:增加细节引起的破句。往往以下面的词语开头:for example, also, except, such as, including, especially, among, like。
修改后:International travel has given rise to large numbers of employment opportunities in retail, hospitality and transportation。
Many sociologists point out that rural emigrants are putting pressure on population control. And also threatening to take already scarce city jobs。
点评:缺少主语的破句。用and之类连词打头的短语或句子居多,可通过使破句依附于前面的句子或加上主语的方式进行更正。
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