①要点不全,漏掉最后一个要点。
②句子基本无误,能正确传递信息给读者但文章不流畅,句子与句子之间过渡不自然,给读者感觉在回答上述① ② ③问题。
③有少量错误。
[学生习作b]
My hobby is reading .reading books is very enjoyable .
When I was young, my mother used to tell me a story before
I went to bed every night .the stories were so interesting
that I always felt they werent enough . So I began to read
books by myself .little by little I became interested in
reading . I can learn much knowledge and many interesting
things all over the world .when I read books , I can enjoy the
beautiful sentences . At the same time I can improve my
writing . I want to be a writer in the future, so I must study
hard and read more books so that my dream can come true .
①开门见山、点题。
②真情流露,理由充分。
③文中带圈的连词使用得恰当,使文章过渡自然、
④巧妙使用句型以表决心。
[点评]:档次13-14分。
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