"Many people are complaining, though, that Obama is becoming too scripted. Last night, he was having an intimate moment with Michelle, and she said, \'Wait, are you reading the teleprompter?\'" --Jimmy Fallon

“许多人都在抱怨，说奥巴马正在变得过于照本宣科了。昨晚，他正在和老婆米歇尔亲密的时候，老婆突然说，‘等等，你是不是正在用电子提词机啊？’” -吉米·法伦

"Did you hear about this? Nickelodeon\'s asking all children to unplug electronic devices for one minute on Earth Day to teach the importance of respecting the environment. I think it\'s a great idea, unless the kids are visiting their grandmother in a nursing home. Then that one minute is pretty rough. \'SpongeBob killed Nana. What happened?\'" --Jimmy Fallon

“你听说了吗？Nickelodeon儿童电视频道呼吁，所有的小孩在地球日那天拔掉家里电子设备的电源线一分钟，以教育他们尊重环境的重要性。我认为这是一个很好的主意，除非孩子们那天正在探访疗养院里的祖母。那样的话那断电的一分钟会是相当难受的。海棉宝宝谋杀祖母，怎么回事啊？” ——吉米·法伦

March 24, 2009

"The market rallied yesterday after the Treasury said it was going to help banks sell off their toxic assets. That\'s the big problem, banks can\'t sell toxic assets. Well, duh. I mean, I\'m no economist, but maybe you should stop calling them toxic assets. Huh? Isn\'t that like KFC advertising salmonella chicken?" --Jay Leno

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