Even though he lived about an hour away, it felt like he was there in an instant. As soon as he walked in, he took charge and took care of Jason and me. Among other small kindnesses, he gave me a credit card and said, Why dont you buy something to wear to the funeral? He gave me permission to be a 17-year-old to focus on the more mundane issue of what I was going to wear instead of weighty adult concerns. 他住的地方离我家有一个小时的路程,但他好像立刻就到了。他一走进来就接手了家里的事情开始照顾我和贾森。在他很多充满关心的举动中,其中一个就是给了我一张信用卡,对我说:去给自己买件葬礼上穿的衣服吧。 他允许我做一个17岁的孩子让我将心思放在更实际的穿什么衣服的问题上,而不要求我像成年人一样思考沉重的问题。
Generally, when children are orphaned, a family member comes forward to take them in. This didnt happen in our case. Everyone had a good reason, I suppose. My moms father was too old to assume responsibility for us; my mothers sister and her husband had three kids of their own and werent able to take in any others; her other two siblings were both single and worked long hours. The guardian named in my mothers will was a babysitter that none of us had seen in 15 years. But I can tell you this: Abandonment, even for very good reasons, feels awful. It was heartbreaking and terrifying to have lost the person we loved most and then to be set adrift. Months passed and it felt like our relatives could offer no reassurances. The only news we got was that if Jason and I remained without a guardian, we would have to enter foster care. Our mother was gone, and there was nothing we could do to save ourselves. 通常情况下,有孩子沦为孤儿时,他们的家庭成员会前来收养他们。但当我和弟弟成了孤儿时,情况却并非如此。我想他们每个人都有足够的理由吧。母亲的父亲年纪太大了,不能再承担照顾我们的责任;母亲的姐姐/妹妹和她的丈夫养育了三个孩子,不可能再抚养更多的孩子了;而她的另外两个兄弟(或姐妹)都单身,而且都长时间在外工作。母亲的遗嘱指定的监护人是一个保姆,一个我和弟弟在15年里都不曾见过的人。但是我可以告诉你:被遗弃的感觉很糟糕,无论遗弃你的人有多么充分的理由。刚刚失去挚爱的人,紧接着生活就没有了着落,这种感觉令人心碎和恐慌。几个月过去了,我们的亲戚好像都不能收留我们。我们得到的唯一的消息是:如果我和贾森接下来仍然没有监护人的话,我们就不得不去寄养机构了。母亲走了,而我们对保护自己却束手无策。
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