The discrepancy seems to come from a simple misplaced belief that thoughtful presents are the best presents. They are not. In fact, they might just be the worst presents. The more thought you put into a present, the more likely you are to stray from buying what the person you’re buying the present for actually wants.
“Gift givers tend to focus on what people are like instead of what people actually would like,” said Steffel. “And it’s most pronounced when they’re shopping for people they are close to.”
In other words, people let their gift-giving egos get in the way of great presents. Especially when the recipient is someone they want to show they know really well. Fortunately, the answer to our collective insistence on guessing what people want is simple: stop it.
“People want whatever it is they happen to want in the moment, which can be very specific,” Steffel said. “You’re much better off asking people what they want.” If that’s too callous, or impersonal, there’s another helpful rule of thumb. Instead of buying restrictive gifts, like gift cards for specific stores, buy gifts that allow for flexibility, like gift cards that can be used more broadly (or, better yet, cash). People tend to prefer gift cards to actual gifts, and cash to both, Steffel explained. Steffel’s latest research, which focuses on gift card giving, points to exactly this point—that versatility is the key to better gift giving.
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