Fortunately our property[9] is located on a main road. This is both a good thing and a bad thing. Remember this, because I shall return to it later.
When spring came I found myself driving to the city at least once every few weeks. I needed to hug a tall building. I wasn’t adapting[10] so well. Duane, on the other hand, gleefully purchased an ATV, a chainsaw, a riding lawnmower—new toys he had only dreamed about.[11]
That first spring also brought wildlife, something we thought we knew about. A skunk began lurking about the property during the day.[12] The dogs would bark at it, I would throw things at it and it would just look up at me as if to say, “You want something, old lady?” It was getting annoying, because although my dogs aren’t the brightest of creatures, they have a strong prey drive and were just itching to get at that skunk.[13]
Duane decided to take matters into his own hands. He cornered the skunk outside the basement and proceeded to fire a BB gun at it.[14] This apparently annoyed the skunk enough to make it raise its tail and spray directly into a vent leading to the air ducts in the house.[15] That annoyed me enough to stop talking to Duane for a few days.
A few nights later, when I discovered Duane in his underwear on the deck outside the bedroom at 3 a.m., firing BBs at raccoons, I decided to put a halt to his antics and took away his BB gun.[16] He’ll get it back when he matures.
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