缺乏安全感吗?这真的要怪你父母_公共英语阅读理解

缺乏安全感吗?这真的要怪你父母

事实上，如果你看看经典的依恋风格类型——安全型、不安全焦虑型、不安全回避型，和不安全紊乱型——很容易看出你和你遇见过的人属于哪种类型。这种分类来自于对数以千计的婴儿和幼儿的观察，他们的看护者离开一会儿，留下他们独自一人或者是和陌生人待一起，然后看护者再返回，这称为“陌生情景”的测试。而成年人在遇到压力的时候如何对待他们喜欢的人，也可以分为这些类型。

Secure children get upset when their caregivers leave, and run toward them with outstretched arms when they return. They fold into the caregiver and are quickly soothed. A securely attached adult similarly goes to a loved one for comfort and support when they, say, are passed over for a promotion at work or feel vulnerable or hurt. They are also eager to reciprocate when the tables are turned.

安全型的孩子在看护者离开时表现出不安，并在看护者回来时伸出手臂向他们跑去。他们抱住看护者，情绪很快就舒缓下来。类似地，安全型的成年人如果错过晋升，或感觉脆弱受伤时，也会向亲人寻求安慰和支持。而当亲人遇到问题时，他们也乐于提供安慰和支持。

Children high on the insecure anxious end of the spectrum get upset when caregivers leave and may go to them when they return. But these children aren’t easily soothed, usually because the caregiver has proved to be an unreliable source of comfort in the past. They may kick and arch their back as if they are angry. As adults, they tend to obsess about their relationships and may be overly dramatic in order to get attention. They may hound romantic interests instead of taking it slow.