I was the tallest in my level 1 class—most of the other students were 7 and 8 years old.I stuck out like a strange and foolish thumb(拇指).Nine months later,I mastered pointe (芭蕾舞中足尖站立的姿势)and a year after that,I was invited to join my studio's Company Two and I really started to get serious about ballet.A secret hope began to grow.My instructors and my parents kept telling me that I had talent.I was tall for my age and had all long arms and legs;ballet just felt right in my body.When dancing,I felt so free that I was oblivious of my technique.Being able to move in such a different way made me free and easy.
I don't still like to look in the mirror,honestly.Seeing myself made me uncomfortable;I thought I wasn't pretty and I didn't look as graceful (优雅的) as I felt but the studio mirror is one of the main tools a dancer has to use and eventually I had to face myself.It wasn't easy.
When I was 5,I went through a very painful experience that changed me.I became terrified of just everything in life as a result of the harm I experienced from a teenage boy of our neighbor.To this day,even with lots of comfort,I still struggle with that fear and shame.But when I dance,I feel free.
What I didn't know at first was that ballet would also be healing.It has been five years since I started ballet,during which I have learnt how not to live in fear and shame.I will never stop dancing.
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