获得97.6k好评的回答@Russell Backman：

I am in the middle of a divorce after 27 years, which I thought was going to be forever. I didn’t want the divorce, initially. However, now that we have been separated over a year, I didn’t know how much I had changed. I am now somewhat glad we are divorcing. I wish we could have both changed and worked it out, but too much water under the bridge. I have changed significantly, being happier and more comfortable with the new me.

27年的婚姻生活之后我正在离婚，本来我以为这段婚姻会天长地久。最初我不想离婚，然而既然我们已经分开一年多了，我不知道自己变了多少，我现在还有点开心能离婚。我希望我们过去能做出更多改变并解决这件事，但已覆水难收。我已经改变了很多，现在的自己更幸福，过得更舒服。

One of the toughest problems in long term marriage is that as time goes on you lose a sense of self, as you melt together as a couple. This loss of self is a big problem. Some look outside of the marriage for activities or even relationships not because they don’t love their spouse, but because they feel truly lost.

长期的婚姻生活中最难处理的问题之一就是随着时间流逝你会失去自我，因为作为夫妻你们要磨合。失去自我是个大问题，有些人寻求婚外之乐，甚至有人会有婚外情，并不是因为他们不爱自己的伴侣了，而是他们真的感觉自己失去太多了。

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