Once I digested this insight my feelings changed from those of a needy child to ones of a very proud daughter. Looking at my father more objectively allowed me to view him clearly: he was a man of few words; he was intelligent, kind and extremely modest. Ironically I began to feel closer to him in death than I had while he was alive.
一旦我领悟了这点,我感觉自己一下从一个贪婪的小孩变成了一个骄傲的女儿。更客观地看待父亲让我更透彻地了解他:他是个少言寡语的人;他很聪明、善良而且极其谦虚。让人讽刺的是,我甚至开始觉得我和他现在的关系比他生前时更亲密。
With this new-found wisdom came the freedom to give up trying so very hard to gain the affections of others and to concentrate on finding me. I shattered the family taboo of silence about the break-up of my parents' marriage. I also felt the need to speak out about the detrimental effect I felt my step-parents had had on my life.
这个新发现的人生智慧为我重新诠释了自由的定义,我不会再费尽艰辛地去赢取他人的欢心,更不会再以自我为中心。我打破了家人对父母破碎婚姻三缄其口的家庭禁忌。我也觉得有必要大声告诉我的继父母他们曾对我的生活造成的不利影响。
In some ways the consequences have been quite dire and I no longer have contact with my mother. However, Dad's hug had a profound effect on me. It carried me along a path from childhood to adulthood. At last I am my own woman and one who loves nothing better than a good old-fashioned hug.
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