Then this guy Whitley Strieber came along, and he sort of took the joy out of it, you know? What a killjoy shitbag he is. Today we abduct only nerdy guys who live alone in Airstream trailers, primarily because they're nerds and, truth be told, we just like to mess with their heads.
Many of you have written asking about crop circles, so let's set the record straight.
It ain't us. Really, it's not. Think about it. You people have trouble reaching your own moon, and even you have cell phones, satellite TV, and high-speed DSL.
We sail between stars at speeds you believe impossible—you think we have to knock downveggies(蔬菜)in order to communicate?
And why do you always assume we land in rural areas? Please. On a planet with New York, Rio de Janeiro, Paris, and Amsterdam, you figure we'd choose to hang out in Roswell, New Mexico? Have any of you actually been there? (By the way, Area 51 is a real hole. In the unlikely event we're ever in the neighborhood again, we're staying someplace else for sure.)
We would be remiss if we failed to mention theanal(肛门的,直肠的)probing. For the longest time, we swear we thought those were data ports. We meant no harm, and hope that you will, like us, try to forget this unfortunate chapter in our history. Inretrospect(回顾往事)it was simply a bad idea.
Now we don't want to be seen aswhiners(哀诉者,哭诉者),but there are a few things we wish to discuss.
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2020-12-21
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