I’d like to address an important religious matter: the issue of going to confession. Or, as Hillary calls it, the Fourth of July weekend with FBI Director Comey.
Now, I am told Hillary went to confession before tonight’s event, but the priest was having a hard time when he asked her about her sins, and she said she couldn’t remember 39 times. Oh, Man!
Hillary is so corrupt, she got kicked off the Watergate Commission. How corrupt do you have to be to get kicked off the Watergate Commission? Pretty corrupt. Hillary is and has been in politics since the 70s. What is her pitch? The economy is busted, the government is corrupt, Washington is failing. “Vote for me. I have been working on these problems for 30 years. I can fix it”, she says.
I wasn’t really sure if Hillary was going to be here tonight, because, I guess, you didn’t send her an invitation by email. Or maybe you did, and she just found out about it through the wonder of WikiLeaks. We have learned so much from WikiLeaks. For example, Hillary Clinton believes that it is vital to deceive the people by having one public policy – and a totally different policy in private. That’s okay. I don’t know who they are angry at. Hillary, you or I. For example, here she is tonight, in public, pretending not to hate Catholics.
Now, some of you haven’t noticed, Hillary is not laughing as much as the rest of us. That’s because she knows the jokes. And all of the jokes were given to her in advance of the dinner by Donna Brazile – which is – everyone knows, of course, Hillary’s belief that it takes a village, which only makes sense, after all, in places like Haiti, where she’s taken a number of them.
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