00:02:24,500　　■　　3　　00:02:24,510 --> 00:02:28,510　　翻译：Vin　　Tina　　海因里希　　Joanna　　4　　00:02:24,510 --> 00:02:28,510　　■　　5　　00:02:28,510 --> 00:02:32,510　　后期：孤帆　　时间轴：YY　　6　　00:02:28,510 --> 00:02:32,510　　■　　7　　00:02:32,510 --> 00:02:36,510　　校对：雨亦奇　　总监：YY　　8　　00:02:32,510 --> 00:02:36,510　　■　　9　　00:02:38,610 --> 00:02:40,410　　生活大爆炸　　第四季第一集　　10　　00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:07,420　　现在是宫保鸡丁　　And now the kung pao chicken.　　11　　00:00:08,190 --> 00:00:09,460　　很顺利啊　　Smooth.　　12　　00:00:09,460 --> 00:00:10,960　　最后　　And finally,　　13　　00:00:10,960 --> 00:00:13,250　　我的木须肉　　my moo shu pork.　　14　　00:00:15,750 --> 00:00:17,270　　给力!　　Whoo-hoo!　　15　　00:00:17,700 --> 00:00:18,790　　菜上齐了　　先生们　　Oh, there you have it, gentlemen.　　16　　00:00:18,790 --> 00:00:22,090　　整整一桌由机器人上的晚餐　　Our entire dinner unpacked by robot.　　17　　00:00:22,540 --> 00:00:24,610　　而且只花了28分钟　　And it only took 28 minutes.　　18　　00:00:25,630 --> 00:00:28,540　　是很不错　　但我们必须要小心　　Impressive, but we must be cautious.　　19　　00:00:28,540 --> 00:00:32,510　　-为什么　　-今天机器人来上中国菜　　- Why?　　- Today, it's a Chinese food retrieval robot.　　20　　00:00:32,510 --> 00:00:34,630　　明天就穿越回过去　　Tomorrow, it travels back in time　　21　　00:00:34,630 --> 00:00:36,830　　谋杀莎拉·康纳　　and tries to kill Sarah Connor.　　22　　00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:39,560　　我可不觉得这会发生　　谢尔顿　　I don't think that's going to happen, Sheldon.　　23　　00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:41,140　　确实没发生过　　No one ever does.　　24　　00:00:41,140 --> 00:00:43,060　　所以才会发生　　That's why it happens.　　25　　00:00:44,050 --> 00:00:45,580　　嘿　　晚餐到了吗　　Hey. Is the food here?　　26　　00:00:45,580 --> 00:00:47,030　　这是什么　　Ooh. What's that?　　27　　00:00:47,030 --> 00:00:48,160　　亲爱的女士　　That, dear lady,　　28　　00:00:48,160 --> 00:00:50,530　　这叫沃罗威茨程控手　　is the Wolowitz Programmable Hand,　　29　　00:00:50,530 --> 00:00:52,300　　专为维修国际空间站　　designed for extravehicular repairs　　30　　00:00:52,300 --> 00:00:54,650　　而设计的延伸臂　　on the International Space Station.　　31　　00:00:54,650 --> 00:00:56,140　　好酷啊　　Ah, cool.　　32　　00:00:56,140 --> 00:00:57,900　　叫我把酱油递给你　　Ask me to pass the soy sauce.　　33　　00:00:57,900 --> 00:01:00,620　　空间站里有人用机械手打酱油吗　　Oh, does that come up much on the space station?　　34　　00:01:01,070 --> 00:01:03,890　　通常会是亚裔或犹太航天员　　Mostly with Asian and Jewish astronauts.　　35　　00:01:04,530 --> 00:01:07,100　　-好吧　　给我酱油　　-就来　　- All right. Pass the soy sauce.　　- Coming up.　　36　　00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:19,950　　工作如何　　So how's work?　　37　　00:01:19,950 --> 00:01:21,390　　还不赖吧　　Oh, it's not bad.　　38　　00:01:21,390 --> 00:01:22,510　　有点饿了　　Kind of hungry.　　39　　00:01:22,510 --> 00:01:24,150　　我们都饿　　Yeah, we all are.　　40　　00:01:24,570 --> 00:01:25,970　　等等就好　　Just wait.　　41　　00:01:25,970 --> 00:01:27,910　　佩妮　　你有想过　　You realize, Penny, that the technology　　42　　00:01:27,910 --> 00:01:29,810　　这机械臂所蕴含的科技会在某天　　that went into this arm will one day make　　43　　00:01:29,810 --> 00:01:33,470　　让你这种没有能力的服务员下岗么　　unskilled food servers such as yourself obsolete.　　44　　00:01:34,120 --> 00:01:34,720　　真的吗　　Really?　　45　　00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:37,310　　他们会造往你汉堡上吐口水的机器人吗　　They're going to make a robot that spits on your hamburger?　　46　　00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:40,850　　我以为你跟她分手了　　I thought you broke up with her.　　47　　00:01:40,850 --> 00:01:42,400　　她为什么在这儿　　Why is she here?　　48　　00:01:43,080 --> 00:01:44,520　　好了　　搞定　　Okay, here we go.　　49　　00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:47,050　　传递酱油　　Passing the soy sauce.　　50　　00:01:48,560 --> 00:01:50,510　　手抬起来　　Put out your hand.　　51　　00:01:55,930 --> 00:01:57,010　　真不可思议　　That's amazing.　　52　　00:01:57,010 --> 00:01:58,870　　我可不会说不可思议　　I wouldn't say amazing.　　53　　00:01:58,870 --> 00:02:00,790　　最多不过是比《乡村熊狂欢节》里的　　At best, it's a modest leap forward　　54　　00:01:58,870 --> 00:02:05,160　　迪士尼乐园一个用机械动物表演的秀　　55　　00:02:00,790 --> 00:02:05,160　　使用的最基本的科技前进了一小步而已　　from the basic technology that gave us Country Bear Jamboree.　　56　　00:02:06,530 --> 00:02:07,370　　嘿　　谢尔顿　　Hey, Sheldon?　　57　　00:02:07,370 --> 00:02:08,640　　怎么了　　Yes?　　58　　00:02:16,610 --> 00:02:17,860　　和平吗　　Peace?　　59　　00:02:17,860 --> 00:02:19,270　　不　　才不是　　No, not peace.　　60　　00:02:19,270 --> 00:02:19,920　　等着　　Hang on.　　61　　00:02:47,670 --> 00:02:50,710　　美国航天局知道你用这个作餐巾纸架吗　　Does NASA know you're using that thing as a napkin holder?　　62　　00:02:51,020 --> 00:02:54,300　　开玩笑　　他们以为这个还在JPL的保险柜里呢　　You kidding? They still think it's in a secure locker at JPL.　　63　　00:02:51,020 --> 00:02:54,300　　JPL: 喷气推进实验室　　美国顶尖机器人实验室　　64　　00:02:55,390 --> 00:02:56,820　　你偷的　　You stole it?　　65　　00:02:56,820 --> 00:02:57,920　　借的　　Borrowed.　　66　　00:02:57,920 --> 00:03:00,800　　关键在表现得像把自己的东西带到车上　　The trick is to carry it out to your car like you own it.　　67　　00:03:02,990 --> 00:03:04,470　　不好意思　　Excuse me.　　68　　00:03:07,220 --> 00:03:08,810　　艾米正在干洗店　　Amy's at the dry cleaners,　　69　　00:03:08,810 --> 00:03:11,410　　然后想到一个很有趣的双关语　　and she's made a very amusing pun.　　70　　00:03:11,410 --> 00:03:14,140　　"我不喜欢全氯乙烯　　"I don't care for perchloroethylene,　　71　　00:03:14,140 --> 00:03:17,280　　不喜欢乙二醇醚"　　and I don't like glycol ether."　　72　　00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:23,240　　懂了吗　　Get it?　　73　　00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:26,640　　不喜欢乙二醇醚　　She doesn't like glycol ether.　　74　　00:03:28,640 --> 00:03:30,670　　听起来就像"亦"　　Sounds like "either."　　75　　00:03:35,250 --> 00:03:37,420　　"噗-哈-哈"　　"L-O-L."　　76　　00:03:38,160 --> 00:03:39,890　　-艾米是谁　　-他女朋友　　- Who's Amy?　　- His girlfriend.　　77　　00:03:39,890 --> 00:03:42,030　　-谢尔顿有女朋友吗　　-她不是我女朋友　　- Sheldon has a girlfriend?　　- She's not my girlfriend.　　78　　00:03:42,030 --> 00:03:43,860　　-这事儿多久了　　-四个月　　- How long has this been going on?　　- Four months.　　79　　00:03:43,860 --> 00:03:45,030　　她不是我女朋友　　She's not my girlfriend.　　80　　00:03:45,030 --> 00:03:46,490　　你是在说　　过去的四个月里　　Are you telling me, for the past four months　　81　　00:03:46,490 --> 00:03:48,030　　我一直在问你　　"有新鲜事吗"　　I have been asking you, "What's new?"　　82　　00:03:48,030 --> 00:03:49,110　　你居然从来没想过说　　and you never thought to go with,　　83　　00:03:49,110 --> 00:03:50,750　　"谢尔顿有女朋友"吗　　"Sheldon has a girlfriend"?　　84　　00:03:50,750 --> 00:03:52,280　　她不是我女朋友　　She's not my girlfriend.　　85　　00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:53,370　　啊　　等等等等　　Ah... d-d-d-d...　　86　　00:03:53,370 --> 00:03:54,820　　他们怎么认识的　　How did they meet?　　87　　00:03:54,820 --> 00:03:57,280　　拉杰和我把谢尔顿的信息发到交友网站上　　Raj and I entered Sheldon's information on a dating site,　　88　　00:03:57,280 --> 00:03:59,360　　网站速配了艾米·菲拉·福勒　　and it spit out Amy Farrah Fowler.　　89　　00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:01,960　　天哪　　谢尔顿和艾米　　Oh, my God! Sheldon and Amy.　　90　　00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:03,830　　或者像我们所说"谢米"　　Or, as we call them, "Shamy."　　91　　00:04:05,550 --> 00:04:06,570　　谢米　　Shamy.　　92　　00:04:06,570 --> 00:04:08,460　　我必须好好八一八谢米了　　I am so digging the Shamy.　　93　　00:04:08,460 --> 00:04:11,120　　好吧　　各单位注意　　All right, everyone pay attention.　　94　　00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:13,970　　没错　　我是有个朋友叫艾米·菲拉·福勒　　Yes, I have a friend named Amy Farrah Fowler.　　95　　00:04:13,970 --> 00:04:15,380　　没错　　她是女性　　Yes, she is female.　　96　　00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:17,680　　没错　　我们每天交流　　Yes, we communicate on a daily basis,　　97　　00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:20,390　　但是　　她不是我女朋友　　but no, she is not my girlfriend.　　98　　00:04:20,790 --> 00:04:23,150　　好吧　　那你们交流都说什么　　Okay, well, what do you communicate about?　　99　　00:04:23,150 --> 00:04:26,620　　我的物理工作和她的神经生物学工作　　Well, my work in physics, her work in neurobiology,　　100　　00:04:26,620 --> 00:04:30,630　　最新话题是论我们生个孩子的可能性　　and most recently, the possibility of our having a child together.　　101　　00:04:38,300 --> 00:04:39,860　　谢谢　　Thank you.　　102　　00:04:41,010 --> 00:04:42,630　　等等　　要孩子　　Wait a minute-- a child?　　103　　00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:43,710　　你从没见过这女的　　You never see this girl.　　104　　00:04:43,710 --> 00:04:45,850　　只有电邮短信和推特联系　　You just e-mail and text and Twitter.　　105　　00:04:45,850 --> 00:04:48,040　　然后现在就考虑要孩子了　　Now you're considering having a baby?　　106　　00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:50,500　　艾米指出通过我俩的结合　　Amy pointed out that between the two of us,　　107　　00:04:50,500 --> 00:04:52,580　　我们的基因将会有机会　　our genetic material has the potential　　108　　00:04:52,580 --> 00:04:54,460　　制造出前所未有的　　of producing the first in a line　　109　　00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:57,250　　智力超群　　仁慈善良的君主　　of intellectually superior, benign overlords　　110　　00:04:57,250 --> 00:05:00,180　　带领人类走向光明未来　　to guide humanity to a brighter tomorrow.　　111　　00:05:02,460 --> 00:05:04,150　　我猜想未来的历史学家　　I'm guessing that future historians　　112　　00:05:04,150 --> 00:05:08,350　　将会谴责我们不趁这机会杀了谢尔顿　　will condemn us for not taking this opportunity to kill Sheldon.　　113　　00:05:09,460 --> 00:05:11,610　　好吧　　我有个问题　　Okay, I have a question.　　114　　00:05:11,610 --> 00:05:12,540　　请说　　佩妮　　Yes, Penny.　　115　　00:05:12,540 --> 00:05:14,590　　你不喜欢别人碰你　　You don't even like people touching you.　　116　　00:05:14,590 --> 00:05:16,420　　你们怎么做爱呢　　How are you going to have sex?　　117　　00:05:17,820 --> 00:05:20,520　　我们干嘛要做爱　　Why on earth would we have sex?　　118　　00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:24,630　　亲爱的　　你的私处开始发育的时候　　Oh, honey, did your mom not have the talk with you?　　119　　00:05:24,630 --> 00:05:28,040　　你妈妈没跟你谈过吗　　You know, when your private parts started growing?　　120　　00:05:28,310 --> 00:05:31,280　　我很清楚人类繁殖的方式　　I'm quite aware of the way humans usually reproduce,　　121　　00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:33,340　　既脏乱又不卫生　　Which is messy, unsanitary,　　122　　00:05:33,340 --> 00:05:35,500　　而且跟你做了三年邻居　　And based on living next to you for three years,　　123　　00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:39,060　　听了太多不必要又响亮的呼唤神　　Involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity.　　124　　00:05:39,860 --> 00:05:40,710　　天呐　　Oh, God.　　125　　00:05:40,710 --> 00:05:42,410　　对　　就是这句　　Yes, exactly.　　126　　00:05:45,420 --> 00:05:47,640　　因此　　如果艾米和我　　Consequently, if Amy and I choose　　127　　00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:49,280　　选择让一个新生命降临　　to bring new life into this world,　　128　　00:05:49,280 --> 00:05:51,120　　我们会让生育专家　　It will be accomplished clinically,　　129　　00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:54,250　　在实验室用培养皿受精　　with fertility experts in a lab with petri dishes.　　130　　00:05:54,250 --> 00:05:55,280　　这倒提醒我　　Which reminds me--　　131　　00:05:55,280 --> 00:05:58,310　　你不仅屁股大　　而且头脑简单　　精力充沛　　you have broad hips and a certain corn-fed vigor.　　132　　00:05:58,310 --> 00:06:01,260　　你的子宫可以代孕吗　　Is your womb available for rental?　　133　　00:06:03,190 --> 00:06:05,500　　还想深入八一八谢米恋吗　　Still digging the Shamy?　　134　　00:06:06,650 --> 00:06:07,700　　谢尔顿　　Look, Sheldon,　　135　　00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,780　　先别急着选孕育科　　before you race off to the fertility clinic,　　136　　00:06:09,780 --> 00:06:10,990　　你也可以考虑　　you might want to think about--　　137　　00:06:10,990 --> 00:06:12,070　　老天　　怎么说呢　　uh, gee, I don't know--　　138　　00:06:12,070 --> 00:06: 14,860　　切实地花点时间陪她　　maybe actually spending some time with her.　　139　　00:06:14,860 --> 00:06:16,860　　-你是说约会　　-没错　　- You mean dating?　　- Yeah.　　140　　00:06:16,860 --> 00:06:18,440　　-我不能和艾米约会　　-为什么　　- I can't date Amy.　　- Why not?　　141　　00:06:18,440 --> 00:06:20,410　　她不是我女朋友　　She's not my girlfriend.　　142　　00:06:20,410 --> 00:06:22,560　　不要把它当成和女朋友约会　　Okay, look, don't think of it as dating a girlfriend.　　143　　00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:23,880　　把它当成　　Think of it as, uh...　　144　　00:06:23,880 --> 00:06:26,510　　了解你孩子的未来妈妈　　Getting to know the future mother of your child.　　145　　00:06:28,450 --> 00:06:30,840　　我还真没想到　　I hadn't considered that.　　146　　00:06:30,840 --> 00:06:33,480　　她将来应该会接触我们的后代　　I suppose she will have to have access to our progeny.　　147　　00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:35,060　　你觉得通过短信息　　And you don't think I can achieve　　148　　00:06:35,060 --> 00:06:38,290　　我无法达到必要的亲密吗　　the required intimacy via text messaging?　　149　　00:06:38,290 --> 00:06:39,600　　应该不能　　Probably not.　　150　　00:06:40,710 --> 00:06:44,430　　看来电话公司一直在骗我　　It would appear as if the phone companies have been lying to me.　　151　　00:06:47,420 --> 00:06:49,000　　佩妮　　Penny.　　152　　00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:51,290　　佩妮　　佩妮　　Penny. Penny.　　153　　00:06:52,650 --> 00:06:54,970　　你应该知道我站在门的另一边　　You do realize I stand on the other side of the door　　154　　00:06:54,970 --> 00:06:57,790　　等你敲完三次门吧　　waiting for you to finish knocking three times.　　155　　00:06:58,320 --> 00:07:01,400　　我知道　　我能从门缝看到脚的影子　　I know. I can see the shadow of your feet under the door.　　156　　00:07:02,180 --> 00:07:04,380　　重点是敲三次很浪费时间　　Yeah, my point is it's a waste of time.　　157　　00:07:04,380 --> 00:07:05,690　　如果你想找个　　If you're looking for an example　　158　　00:07:05,690 --> 00:07:07,400　　浪费时间的例子　　of a waste of time, I would refer you　　159　　00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:09,630　　我们现在的话题就很浪费时间　　to the conversation we're having right now.　　160　　00:07:10,090 --> 00:07:10,860　　你有事吗　　What do you want?　　161　　00:07:10,860 --> 00:07:13,520　　我决定了接受你的建议　　I've decided to take your advice and have arranged　　162　　00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:15,770　　还安排了跟艾米约会　　to go on a date with Amy Farrah Fowler.　　163　　00:07:15,770 --> 00:07:16,810　　那太好了　　Oh, that's great.　　164　　00:07:16,810 --> 00:07:18,660　　-玩得开心　　-等等　　- Have fun.　　- Wait.　　165　　00:07:18,660 --> 00:07:19,540　　你要载我去　　You have to drive me.　　166　　00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:21,660　　-什么　　-你知道我不开车　　- What?　　- You know I don't drive.　　167　　00:07:21,660 --> 00:07:23,500　　-去问莱纳德　　-问了　　- Well, go ask Leonard.　　- I did.　　168　　00:07:23,500 --> 00:07:25,830　　他说　　我复述　　问问佩妮　　He said-- and I quote-- "Ask Penny.　　169　　00:07:25,830 --> 00:07:28,020　　那是她的可笑主意　　It was her cockamamy idea."　　170　　00:07:29,230 --> 00:07:30,610　　莱纳德说"可笑"?　　Leonard said "cockamamy"?　　171　　00:07:30,610 --> 00:07:32,520　　好吧　　那是我说的　　Actually, I'm paraphrasing.　　172　　00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:34,210　　在基督教家庭长大　　Having been raised in a Christian household,　　173　　00:07:34,210 --> 00:07:36,850　　我实在不习惯他的用语　　I'm uncomfortable with the language he used.　　174　　00:07:37,980 --> 00:07:38,520　　老实说　　And to be honest,　　175　　00:07:38,520 --> 00:07:41,200　　其实我也不喜欢"可笑"这个词　　I'm not entirely comfortable with "cockamamy."　　176　　00:07:41,840 --> 00:07:43,320　　好吧　　什么时候约会　　Okay, fine. When's the date?　　177　　00:07:43,320 --> 00:07:44,990　　-现在　　-现在?　　- Now.　　- Now?　　178　　00:07:44,990 --> 00:07:46,770　　快点　　我们要迟到了　　Hurry. We're going to be late.　　179　　00:07:48,250 --> 00:07:49,590　　谢尔顿　　你有没有想过　　Sheldon, did it ever occur to you　　180　　00:07:49,590 --> 00:07:51,780　　我可能有别的事要忙吗　　that I might have other plans?　　181　　00:07:51,780 --> 00:07:52,750　　对不起　　I'm sorry.　　182　　00:07:52,750 --> 00:07:54,960　　你有别的事忙吗　　Do you have other plans?　　183　　00:07:57,710 --> 00:08:01,000　　倒是没有　　不过　　Well, no, not per se, but...　　184　　00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:03,040　　这么说这个话题　　So this conversation is as pointless　　185　　00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:05,580　　跟你的敲门独白一样没意义咯　　as your door-knocking soliloquy?　　186　　00:08:06,970 --> 00:08:10,140　　我去拿我的可笑钥匙　　Let me get my... cockamamy keys.　　187　　00:08:12,790 --> 00:08:15,320　　天呐　　太爽了　　Oh, God, that feels so good.　　188　　00:08:20,750 --> 00:08:21,730　　对　　就是那里　　Yeah, that's the spot.　　189　　00:08:21,730 --> 00:08:23,490　　宝贝儿　　Oh, baby.　　190　　00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:27,410　　霍华德　　吃饭啦　　Howard, dinner's ready!　　191　　00:08:27,410 --> 00:08:28,320　　我一会再吃　　I'll eat later.　　192　　00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:30,050　　现在很忙　　I'm busy!　　193　　00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:31,950　　爽啊　　Oh, yeah.　　194　　00:08:31,950 --> 00:08:33,990　　就跟人手一样　　Just like a real hand.　　195　　00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:48,810　　谢谢你载我去　　Thank you for driving me.　　196　　00:08:48,810 --> 00:08:50,330　　不客气　　You're welcome.　　197　　00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:54,330　　但我希望你不穿人字拖　　I wish you weren't wearing flip-flops.　　198　　00:08:54,330 --> 00:08:56,550　　穿人字拖开车很危险　　It's dangerous to drive in flip-flops.　　199　　00:08:56,550 --> 00:08:58,160　　-谢尔顿　　-对不起　　- Sheldon.　　- Sorry.　　200　　00:08:58,980 --> 00:09:02,370　　我只是不想成为另一个人字拖的受害者　　I just don't want to be yet another flip-flop fatality.　　201　　00:09:04,660 --> 00:09:06,760　　我能问个问题吗　　Can I ask you a question?　　202　　00:09:06,760 --> 00:09:08,660　　鉴于你的社区大学学历　　Given your community college education,　　203　　00:09:08,660 --> 00:09:11,940　　我鼓励你尽量多问　　I encourage you to ask me as many as possible.　　204　　00:09:13,050 --> 00:09:15,010　　好　　我的问题是　　Yeah. Well, my question is--　　205　　00:09:15,010 --> 00:09:17,670　　其实我很清楚答案　　and I'm pretty sure I know the answer--　　206　　00:09:17,670 --> 00:09:19,580　　这是你第一次约会吗　　Is this your first date?　　207　　00:09:19,990 --> 00:09:21,640　　那得看情况　　That depends.　　208　　00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:23,720　　跟我妹在国庆日　　Does square-dancing with my sister　　209　　00:09:23,720 --> 00:09:26,360　　青年敬耶稣方块舞会上　　at a Teens for Jesus Fourth of July Hoedown　　210　　00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:27,900　　跳舞算吗　　count as a date?　　211　　00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:29,170　　不算　　No.　　212　　00:09:29,170 --> 00:09:31,080　　那这是我第一次约会　　Then, this is my first date.　　213　　00:09:32,470 --> 00:09:34,190　　那有几件事　　Okay. Well, then, there's a couple of things　　214　　00:09:34,190 --> 00:09:36,060　　你应该要知道　　you should probably know.　　215　　00:09:36,060 --> 00:09:38,980　　我有一个硕士学位和两个博士学位　　I have a master's degree and two doctorates.　　216　　00:09:38,980 --> 00:09:42,050　　我应该知道的事　　我都知道　　The things I should know, I do know.　　217　　00:09:43,330 --> 00:09:46,490　　我的意思是　　我比你更清楚约会　　My point is, I know more about dating than you,　　218　　00:09:46,490 --> 00:09:48,170　　而且如果你真有你认为的那么聪明　　and if you were as smart as you think you are,　　219　　00:09:48,170 --> 00:09:49,800　　你就会听我的话　　you would listen to me.　　220　　00:09:50,560 --> 00:09:53,680　　如果你是约会专家　　那怎么我今晚有约会　　If you know so much, how come I have a date tonight　　221　　00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:56,890　　而你只能当我的司机呢　　and you have nothing better to do than drive me to it?　　222　　00:09:59,670 --> 00:10:01,340　　说得好　　Fair point.　　223　　00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:07,460　　《水行侠》的有些问题我想不明白　　You know, there's something I've always wondered about Aquaman.　　224　　00:10:07,460 --> 00:10:09,830　　-什么　　-他去哪便便　　- Yeah?　　- Where does he poop?　　225　　00:10:12,670 --> 00:10:13,530　　什么　　What?　　226　　00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:16,190　　亚特兰蒂斯的马桶长什么样　　What would a toilet look like in Atlantis?　　227　　00:10:16,190 --> 00:10:17,120　　你怎么冲掉呢　　How would you flush it?　　228　　00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:21,000　　就算你冲掉了　　便便又能冲去哪呢　　And when you did flush it, where would the poop go?　　229　　00:10:24,810 --> 00:10:26,490　　一会儿再讨论　　Hold that thought.　　230　　00:10:27,430 --> 00:10:29,240　　喂　　霍华德　　怎么了　　Hey, Howard. What's going on?　　231　　00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:31,410　　啥　　What...　　232　　00:10:31,410 --> 00:10:33,820　　等等　　霍华德　　慢点说　　Hold on. Howard, Howard, slow down.　　233　　00:10:33,820 --> 00:10:36,400　　机械手卡在你的什么上了　　The robot hand is stuck on your what?　　234　　00:10:40,010 --> 00:10:42,150　　说出来肯定吓你一跳　　You're not going to believe this.　　235　　00:10:56,530 --> 00:10:58,460　　艾米　　听谢尔顿说　　So, um, Amy, Sheldon tells me　　236　　00:10:58,460 --> 00:11:01,610　　你是一个神经...什么来着　　you're a neuro... something-or-other.　　237　　00:11:02,520 --> 00:11:04,950　　是神经生物学家　　Neurobiologist.　　238　　00:11:04,950 --> 00:11:07,390　　你车的"检查引擎"灯亮了　　Your "check engine" light is on.　　239　　00:11:09,270 --> 00:11:10,620　　噢　　不管它　　Yeah, it's okay.　　240　　00:11:10,620 --> 00:11:11,630　　但如果灯亮了就说明...　　But the light indicates...　　241　　00:11:11,630 --> 00:11:12,990　　不用费心了　　Don't bother.　　242　　00:11:12,990 --> 00:11:14,670　　我已经浪费太多时间　　I've wasted many an hour　　243　　00:11:14,670 --> 00:11:17,340　　攻击这座顽固的风车了　　tilting at that particular windmill.　　244　　00:11:19,750 --> 00:11:21,320　　你用的什么香水吗　　Uh, what is that scent you're wearing?　　245　　00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:22,810　　真好闻　　It smells great.　　246　　00:11:22,810 --> 00:11:24,800　　去屑洗发水　　Dandruff shampoo.　　247　　00:11:26,190 --> 00:11:28,570　　我头皮干燥　　I have dry scalp.　　248　　00:11:29,910 --> 00:11:32,530　　你发质看着很好呀　　Well, your hair looks very nice.　　249　　00:11:32,530 --> 00:11:35,070　　你是同性恋么　　Are you a homosexual?　　250　　00:11:35,850 --> 00:11:39,060　　当然不　　我只是赞美你而已　　No, no, I'm just giving you a compliment.　　251　　00:11:40,540 --> 00:11:43,610　　要你是同性恋　　赞美不听着更由衷吗　　Would have been more flattered if you were a homosexual.　　252　　00:11:46,290 --> 00:11:47,400　　那啥　　来点音乐怎样　　Guys, how 'bout some music?　　253　　00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:49,570　　哦不　　我可不想要　　Oh, no, I wouldn't care for that.　　254　　00:11:49,570 --> 00:11:50,210　　艾米　　你呢　　Amy?　　255　　00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:51,950　　我也是　　谢了　　No, thank you.　　256　　00:11:51,950 --> 00:11:53,240　　好吧　　Okay.　　257　　00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:55,830　　那就诡异地沉默着吧　　Uncomfortable silence it is.　　258　　00:12:00,060 --> 00:12:02,020　　谢尔顿　　你有没有告诉艾米　　Hey, Sheldon, have you told Amy　　259　　00:12:02,020 --> 00:12:04,820　　你小时候在德州长大的经历　　what it was like for you growing up in Texas?　　260　　00:12:04,820 --> 00:12:06,170　　没有　　No.　　261　　00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:10,490　　哎　　为什么不告诉她　　Well, why don't you tell her?　　262　　00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:12,310　　好吧　　All right.　　263　　00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:14,430　　痛苦得要死　　It was hell.　　264　　00:12:16,350 --> 00:12:18,280　　艾米　　有什么想法么　　Any follow up, Amy?　　265　　00:12:19,270 --> 00:12:20,950　　没有　　No.　　266　　00:12:25,450 --> 00:12:27,360　　我在内布拉斯加州长大　　I myself grew up in Nebraska.　　267　　00:12:27,360 --> 00:12:29,140　　奥马哈郊外的一个小镇　　Small town outside of Omaha.　　268　　00:12:29,140 --> 00:12:34,290　　很好的地方　　大多是家庭农场　　还有些制毒窝点　　Nice place, mostly family farms, a few meth labs.　　269　　00:12:34,290 --> 00:12:38,020　　不好意思　　这样还不如诡异地沉默呢　　I'm sorry, how is this better than uncomfortable silence?　　270　　00:12:38,020 --> 00:12:40,040　　我也不知道　　不过是试着找点话题　　I don't know. I was just trying something.　　271　　00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:44,470　　麻瓜一个[此处引用《哈利波特》里的说法]　　Muggles.　　272　　00:12:50,590 --> 00:12:54,690　　你是滑倒摔进机械手里的吗　　You slipped and fell into a robot hand?　　273　　00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:58,030　　对　　Yes.　　274　　00:12:58,850 --> 00:13:00,770　　鸡鸡先着地　　Penis first?　　275　　00:13:04,030 --> 00:13:05,970　　对　　快帮我　　Yes. Now, help me!　　276　　00:13:05,970 --> 00:13:07,560　　我本来想建议用润滑剂　　I'd suggest a lubricant, but I have a feeling　　277　　00:13:07,560 --> 00:13:09,650　　但我想其实你已经栽在润滑剂里了　　you fell on some of that as well.　　278　　00:13:10,890 --> 00:13:12,360　　不好笑　　莱纳德　　Not funny, Leonard.　　279　　00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:15,250　　是吗　　一个机械手卡在你小弟弟上　　Really? A robot hand's got a death grip on your junk, dude.　　280　　00:13:15,250 --> 00:13:17,140　　这还不好笑吗　　不信你问别人　　That's funny, ask anyone.　　281　　00:13:18,180 --> 00:13:20,810　　拜托　　趁我妈还没进来　　快把这玩意弄掉　　Plea-- before my mother walks in, get this off me!　　282　　00:13:20,810 --> 00:13:21,850　　唔　　我看看　　Okay, let's see.　　283　　00:13:21,850 --> 00:13:22,740　　别　　别碰电脑　　No, no! Don't touch.　　284　　00:13:22,740 --> 00:13:23,800　　程序暂停了　　The program is paused.　　285　　00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:25,130　　那就重新启动呗　　Well, then let's un-pause it.　　286　　00:13:25,130 --> 00:13:26,400　　别　　导入错误的程序　　No, no! I loaded the wrong program.　　287　　00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:28,310　　这玩意以为自己在外太空握着把螺丝刀呢　　The hand thinks it's holding a screwdriver in outer space.　　288　　00:13:28,310 --> 00:13:32,000　　要是程序继续　　它就要开始扭了　　If you continue the program, it's gonna start twisting.　　289　　00:13:33,550 --> 00:13:34,610　　好吧　　A-All right.　　290　　00:13:34,610 --> 00:13:36,260　　这样如何　　Um, how about this.　　291　　00:13:36,260 --> 00:13:39,210　　小熊维尼的脑袋卡在蜂蜜树上时　　When-when Winnie the Pooh got his head stuck　　292　　00:13:39,210 --> 00:13:42,230　　他的伙伴们就会上去拉住他　　in the honey tree, his friends all grabbed onto him　　293　　00:13:42,230 --> 00:13:44,900　　然后往外拔啊拔啊拔　　and pulled and pulled.　　294　　00:13:46,430 --> 00:13:47,180　　你爱咋咋地　　You do what you want,　　295　　00:13:47,180 --> 00:13:49,820　　我可不想碰其他男人的"蜂蜜树"　　I'm not touching another man's honey tree.　　296　　00:13:50,820 --> 00:13:52,280　　好吧　　不拔了　　All right, uh, forget pulling.　　297　　00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:54,920　　那就找把电锯　　直接锯掉　　How about we get an electric saw and cut it off?　　298　　00:13:54,920 --> 00:13:56,720　　啥　　不准用电锯　　What?! No saws!　　299　　00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:58,870　　一个包皮环切还不够吗　　One circumcision was enough.　　300　　00:14:02,350 --> 00:14:04,380　　那乙快焊炬呢　　How about an acetylene torch?　　301　　00:14:04,380 --> 00:14:06,150　　好吧　　不敢相信我还要声明这些　　Okay, I can't believe this needs to be said out loud.　　302　　00:14:06,150 --> 00:14:08,540　　不准拔　　不准用电锯和焊炬　　No pulling, no saws, no torches.　　303　　00:14:08,540 --> 00:14:10,150　　那你要我们做啥　　Well, then what do you want us to do?　　304　　00:14:10,150 --> 00:14:12,550　　霍华德　　我做了饼干　　Howard, I made cookies for you　　305　　00:14:12,550 --> 00:14:15,010　　给你和你的小伙伴　　and your little friends!　　306　　00:14:15,450 --> 00:14:17,480　　好极了　　老妈　　多谢　　That's great, Mom, thanks!　　307　　00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:20,310　　我送上来　　再带点夏威夷宾治酒　　I'll bring them up with some Hawaiian Punch!　　308　　00:14:20,310 --> 00:14:21,690　　别上来　　Don't come up here!　　309　　00:14:21,690 --> 00:14:24,920　　干嘛　　看不起你妈吗　　Why not?! Are you ashamed of your mother?!　　310　　00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:27,320　　话是没错　　但这不是关键　　Yes, but that's not the point!　　311　　00:14:28,310 --> 00:14:29,440　　快帮帮忙　　Get me out of here.　　312　　00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:31,590　　你有想法吗　　拉杰　　You have any ideas, Raj?　　313　　00:14:31,590 --> 00:14:34,520　　现在啊　　我满脑子都是饼干和夏威夷宾治酒　　Right now, all I can think about is cookies and Hawaiian Punch.　　314　　00:14:42,030 --> 00:14:46,030　　好吧　　换个话题　　Hey, here's another possible topic of conversation.　　315　　00:14:46,030 --> 00:14:48,040　　今晚是谢尔顿的盛大之夜啊　　This is a big night for Sheldon.　　316　　00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:50,210　　是吧　　谢尔顿　　Right, Sheldon?　　317　　00:14:50,210 --> 00:14:51,820　　盛大　　Big night?　　318　　00:14:52,500 --> 00:14:55,260　　冬至日的夜晚才叫大　　The winter solstice is a big night.　　319　　00:14:55,760 --> 00:14:56,940　　在南加利福尼亚　　It's over 14 hours　　320　　00:14:56,940 --> 00:14:58,910　　一共有整整14小时呢　　in Southern California.　　321　　00:15:00,010 --> 00:15:02,170　　这句话仿得真有意思　　That's an amusing factoid.　　322　　00:15:02,540 --> 00:15:04,020　　谢谢　　Thank you.　　323　　00:15:05,410 --> 00:15:06,250　　不　　No, no.　　324　　00:15:06,250 --> 00:15:10,960　　我是说　　今晚是谢尔顿第一次正式约会　　My point is, uh, tonight is Sheldon's first official date.　　325　　00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:12,630　　你们继续吧　　Discuss.　　326　　00:15:13,090 --> 00:15:14,040　　真的吗　　Is this true?　　327　　00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:17,150　　当然　　在国庆日上的青年敬基督　　Apparently, a semi-incestuous Teens for Jesus　　328　　00:15:17,150 --> 00:15:19,970　　方块舞会上的那次半乱伦约会不算　　Fourth of July Hoedown didn't count.　　329　　00:15:21,340 --> 00:15:22,990　　艾米　　那你呢　　So, um, Amy, what about you?　　330　　00:15:22,990 --> 00:15:23,920　　你约会过吗　　Do you date much?　　331　　00:15:23,920 --> 00:15:25,200　　一年一次　　Once a year.　　332　　00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:26,250　　我和我妈说好了　　It's a deal I made with my mother　　333　　00:15:26,250 --> 00:15:28,370　　这样她就不唠叨这事　　in exchange for her silence on the matter,　　334　　00:15:28,370 --> 00:15:30,410　　还可以偶尔用她的乔治·富曼烤架　　as well as the occasional use of her George Foreman Grill　　335　　00:15:30,410 --> 00:15:33,260　　锁住美味　　没有脂肪　　that seals in the flavor without the fat.　　336　　00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:36,620　　你呢　　佩妮　　How about you, Penny?　　337　　00:15:36,620 --> 00:15:38,130　　你约会过很多次吗　　Do you go on many dates?　　338　　00:15:38,130 --> 00:15:39,890　　其实也没有很多次啦　　Uh, yeah, I wouldn't say many.　　339　　00:15:39,890 --> 00:15:41,240　　有几个吧　　A few.　　340　　00:15:44,890 --> 00:15:46,920　　这算啥表情　　What's...?　　341　　00:15:47,370 --> 00:15:51,700　　你把约171个不同男人描述为"有几个"　　Your characterization of approximately 171 different men as "A few."　　342　　00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:53,150　　什么　　What...　　343　　00:15:53,690 --> 00:15:" type="audio/mpeg" />-->