情感专家告诉你：如何“科学地”说分手_公共英语阅读理解

情感专家告诉你：如何“科学地”说分手

卫恩齐说，当你已经打定主意后，再继续保持关系会很煎熬，虽然不希望伤害别人，但这是一个必经过程。“每一个想分手的人，不会在冒出这个念头的第一时间就说出来。他们都要考虑一番，确定自己要分手，并做好准备，”卫恩齐说，“一般都是这样操作的。”

Once you’ve resolutely decided to end things, however, you shouldn’t delay the conversation or prematurely act like you’re single, Sussman says. “The dumbest thing people do is get involved with other people before their relationship is over. They just want to have a plan B. It can also be to create distance, maybe even on some level of wanting to get caught,” she says. “If you’re involved with someone and the contract is exclusivity and monogamy, to cheat on that person is the most hurtful thing.”

苏斯曼说，一旦你确定要结束一段关系，就不要再拖拖拉拉不提分手，也别过早地向全世界宣布自己是单身。她说：“最愚蠢的事儿就是‘骑驴找马’。有的人总是想给自己留条后路。有的人还会刻意制造距离，甚至盼着被对方发现自己的背叛。爱情是具有排他性的，欺骗是对他人最大的伤害。”

Let them decide whether or not to contact you

让“被甩”的一方决定你们还是不是“朋友”

It may seem kind to check in on your ex or to maintain a friendly rapport after a breakup, but resist the impulse. Both Sussman and Winch say the person who got dumped should be the one to decide when, or if, they want to reopen contact — and ideally, that should only happen after you’ve both moved on completely.