Given up already on your New Year’s Goals? Or maybe you didn’t bother this year? What is it that makes goal-setting work for some and not others?
已经放弃你的新年目标了吗?还是说今年你已经不再设定目标了?为什么设定目标对有些人有用而对有些人则没有呢?
There are many reasons why people fail to achieve their goals, but look below and you might be amazed to find there is a solution to your personal goal-setting failure.
人们没有达成目标有许多原因,不过往下读,你会惊奇地发现,个人目标设定失败是有解决办法的。
Type A: Non-Committal Attitude
A类:态度不坚定
In my experience, the number one reason for failure is that you haven’t really committed to the change in the first place. The age old New Year’s Resolution: “This year I’m going to get fit” will be heard far and wide, but if you really commit to the goal you need to ask yourself how you are going to do it.
根据我的经验,目标失败的首要原因是,从一开始你就并没有真的下决心去改变。“今年我要减肥” 这条新年决心年年处处都能听到,但是如果你真的决定实现这个目标,你需要问问自己该如何去做。
Solution: Clarity is needed to encourage commitment. If you really want to get fit, think it through—decide on the type of exercise you plan to do, and decide what days of the week and at what time you will do it. Having this all decided in advance makes it more difficult to make excuses. Tell people who support you what you intend to do, and even consider finding yourself an accountability buddy who will check up on you and encourage you to keep going.
解决办法:清晰地制定目标,来激励自己完成任务。如果你真的想减肥,仔细想想:确定一种你打算去做的锻炼项目,然后确定一周中的哪几天、几点钟去锻炼。提前确定这些会让你更难为自己找借口。告诉那些支持你的人你的计划,甚至可以考虑找一个值得信赖的朋友督促并鼓励你继续执行下去。
Type B: Aversion to Planning
B类:不愿做计划
Many people don’t like to be seen as planners. They see planners as being stifled and boring, and assume that routines and schedules are not for them. I know this because for many years I fought against routine: I was too young and too cool to plan anything; spontaneity was my best friend. What I found many years later was that by planning, I could achieve more—by planning, I could get things done and leave time to be more creative and spontaneous.
许多人不喜欢做计划。在他们看来,有计划的人无趣,而且让人透不过气来。他们认为惯例和时间表和自己无关。我很清楚这一点,因为多年来我也在和惯例作斗争:我这么年轻这么酷,不用计划任何东西;自发性是我最好的朋友。然而许多年之后我才发现,通过制定计划,我可以实现更多——通过制定计划,我可以把事情做完,而且留出时间,让自己更有创意做更多想做的事。
Solution: Set a goal and plan out how you are going to achieve it. Start small: if you want to write a book, plan and schedule the first chapter. When you achieve this first milestone, you will see how easy it was to do so and then plan the next chapter. Plan regular small steps in your calendar and you will be amazed at how much more you will achieve in life.
解决办法:设定一个目标,并计划该如何实现它。从小事开始:如果你想写一本书,先为第一章做好计划和时间安排。当你完成第一阶段时,你会发现是如此简单,然后继续为下一章做计划。在你的日程表上为小的步骤做好规律的计划,你会惊讶地发现在你的生活中可以实现更多目标。
Type C: Non-Believer
C类:不相信自己
Most of you will be familiar with the Henry Ford quote “If you think you can or think you can’t you are probably right.” This holds true with goals: if you set a goal and deep down don’t believe you can actually achieve it, don’t waste your time.
大部分人应该都熟悉亨利-福特的这句名言:“如果你认为你行,你就真的行;如果你认为你不行,你就真的不行。” 在设定目标上也是如此:如果你设定了一个目标,而打心底里你不相信你可以实现它,那就别浪费时间了。
Solution: Only set goals you believe you can achieve. What can you do if you don’t believe in your own power to achieve any of your goals? Positive affirmations can help you to achieve your goals, so try to make all your thoughts positive and supportive. Monitor your thoughts, when they are negative try and replace them with a positive one.
解决办法:只制定你相信自己可以实现的目标。如果你不相信能凭自己的努力实现目标,那你还能做什么呢?积极的肯定可以帮助你实现目标,所以尽量让你的想法积极乐观。关注你的想法,当出现负面想法时,试着用积极的想法来取代它们。
Type D: Easily Led
D类:容易受他人影响
Then there are those who look to others for affirmation, but instead they get discouragement. “Don’t go for a run—come for a beer instead, it’s way more fun.” Well, it’s more fun for your friend, who won’t feel guilty that they are not exercising when you are. So many people unwittingly try to sabotage your success, and they often do so because if you improve, they’ll be forced to focus on their own stagnation. They will try to drag you back to their level at every opportunity.
还有一些人喜欢从别人那里寻求肯定,但却总是被打击。“别去跑步了,来喝杯啤酒吧,这更有趣。” 好吧,对于你的朋友来说这更有趣,他们并不会因为你在锻炼时他们没有而感到内疚。所以许多人不经意中试图阻挠你的成功,他们这样做是因为如果你进步了,他们就不得不面对自己的止步不前。所以他们要利用每一次机会试图将你拉到和他们一样的水平。
Solution: Hang out with people who support you. If that’s not possible, if you have a sibling or spouse who discourages your goals and dreams, start to recognize when it happens and remain committed to your goal. When you start to recognize that other people are preventing you from living your life, you will stop allowing it to happen.
解决办法:和支持你的人在一起。如果做不到这一点,如果你有一个朋友或伴侣总是打击你的目标和梦想,你要意识到这一点,并继续保持对目标的决心。当你开始意识到其他人在阻止你活出自己的人生时,你将不会允许它发生。
Type E: All or Nothing
E类:急于求成或一事无成
I’ve met many of the “all or nothing” type in my time—they want it all, and they want it now. If it won’t happen tomorrow there is no point in doing it !
我遇到过很多这种类型的人——他们想要实现一切,而且想要立即实现。如果明天没有梦想成真,就没有意义去做了!
Solution: Reality check—nothing happens immediately. Learn to set smaller goals that give you more instant gratification along with your larger goals, so you can have the best of both worlds.
解决办法:现实一些——没有什么会马上发生。在制定较大目标的同时,学会制定一些能让你很快获得满足感的较小目标,这样就可以两全其美了。
Awareness is the key factor when it comes to making changes. By understanding yourself and your excuses you will be better able to make decisions which will serve you and get you a step closer to achieving your goals this year.
你想寻求改变时,意识是关键因素。通过了解你和你的借口,你会更好地做出适合自己,并让你离今年的目标更进一步的决定。
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