The buffering method you choose will make a big difference: Active lying is more damaging than avoidance, research indicates.

你选择的缓冲方法很重要：研究显示，主动说谎比逃避更具破坏性。

A study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships in 2009 found 71% of people whose partners actively lied to them said it created distance. Among those whose partner kept a secret but didn't lie, only 43% said it created distance.

2009年在《社会与人际关系杂志》(Journal of Social and Personal Relationships)上发表的一篇研究论文指出，在伴侣主动对其说谎的人中，71%的人称这样做会产生距离感。而在伴侣保守秘密但不说谎的人，只有43%的人说这样做会产生距离感。

'When people overtly lie about something, they can take something innocuous and make it into a bigger problem, ' says John Caughlin, the study's lead researcher and professor of communication at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. Experts say gender isn't a factor -- both men and women withhold information.

该项研究的首席研究员、伊利诺伊大学香槟分校(University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign)的传播学教授约翰•考林(John Caughlin)说：“当人们公然对某件事撒谎时，他们会将原本并不严重的事情变成一个大问题。”专家称，性别不是决定因素──男性和女性都会隐瞒信息。

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