8. Are you really listening?
你是否真的在倾听?
You’re really just waiting for the other person to stop talking so that you can get your turn. Ha, you’re going to wow them with your speaking skills—who cares what they say?
你其实只是在等待对方结束讲话,这样就轮到你讲了。是呀,你会用你的讲话技巧让他们大为赞赏,谁在乎他们在说什么呢?
Solution: Put your pride on hold and really hear what your talking partner is telling you. Learn to read between the lines. Observe his body language. Avoid asking “yes or no” questions and probe deeper instead. You’re there to listen, not to merely hear.
解决办法:收起你的骄傲,真正去倾听对方对你说的话。学会解读,观察他的肢体语言,避免问用是或否来回答的问题,而是更深的探索。你是来倾听的,而不只是听见。
9. Are you rude to the person you’re talking to?
你是否对待和你聊天的人很粗鲁?
You think you’re better than your talking partner so you don’t think about respecting their opinions. Sure, you use polite language and you mind your manners, but your words offend and your attitude challenges them.
你认为你比和你聊天的人要更棒,所以你不去尊重他们的观点。当然,你用语礼貌,举止文明,但你的话语冒犯了他们,你的态度是在挑衅。
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