Answer: It seems your colleague is on to something. In any negotiation -- and make no mistake, this situation qualifies as one -- the person who is ready to walk away, even if only for the moment, holds most of the power. "The least effective thing you can do is fight emotion with emotion by yelling back at someone who's yelling at you," says Steven P. Cohen. "If one party is emotional and the other stays calm, the unemotional one has far more leverage." The trick is learning how to use it.
回答:你的同事似乎掌握了诀窍。在任何谈判中——没错,这种情况也是谈判的一种——随时可以离开的一方握有最大的主动权,即使只是短暂的离开。斯蒂芬-科恩说:“有人对你吼叫时,效果最差的应对方法便是以牙还牙,用大声叫喊来还击。如果一方情绪激动,而另一方能保持冷静,那么冷静的一方就掌握了更多优势。”而技巧在于如何利用这种优势。
Cohen is president of a consulting firm called The Negotiating Skills Company and author of a new book, The Practical Negotiator: How to Argue Your Point, Plead Your Case, and Prevail in Any Situation. He notes that, while some people use yelling as a deliberate strategy to intimidate others, your boss sounds more like "someone who's out of control and needs help learning how to cope with stress.
科恩是咨询公司谈判技巧公司的总裁,并著有一本新书《实用谈判技巧》。他表示,有的人会故意用大声叫喊作为威吓他人的策略,而你的上司听起来似乎“已经失控,需要好好学习如何应对压力。”
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