这里有一个情景:你正和某人约会。这几个月你们双方都对对方感觉很好。彼此都没有向对方发脾气使性子,凡事先沟通交流意见,唯一坚守的义务就是彼此都要做到诚实坦诚相待。可是尽管这些都做到了,接下来该谈谈“我们该谈一谈”了,“如果没有分手”,当一切都进展得不错时很自然的做法就是不计一切阻止它,对吗?错。
By putting all of that under the rug all you are really doing is denying yourself what you truly need and breaking the rule of always being honest. You are denying yourself validation and as much as we all want to deny we don't need it, we do. Let's be honest. When you are falling in love with someone, the need for validation that they feel the same can eat away and actually do more harm than you know.
你其实是在掩盖内心否认自己真正的需要,其实是在违反做到彼此诚实坦诚相待的原则。你否认自己在求证在确认这段恋爱关系,我们极力否认自己不需要求证确认,我们其实需要求证需要确认。我们还是诚实些吧。当你爱上一个人的时候,需要求证需要确认,他们也觉得同样需要求证需要确认,其实伤害超乎你的想象。
Holding it in teaches you from the beginning of the relationship how to not be honest with your partner. Put on that poker face and pretend like there isn't a giant elephant in the room every time you are together. Not speaking your needs teaches your partner that you and your needs are not equal to their own, and in turn teaches them that it is ok with you that they treat you as such. It is very true we teach people how to treat us and no relationship is 50/50, both people must be willing to give 100% or it will never work.
【一招就脱单 爱了就要大胆说】相关文章:
最新
2020-09-15
2020-09-15
2020-09-15
2020-09-15
2020-09-15
2020-09-15