The best way to keep from egging on an upset person, Behfar found, is to offer a new take on a frustrating situation, or provide context that can help convince a co-worker that the problem isn't that big of a deal.
贝尔法发现,要避免给一个正在发脾气的人火上浇油,最好是针对不利情况提出一个全新的见解,或者帮助他重新分析环境,使他相信问题也许没有想象的那么严重。
It's a rather anti-climatic way to cope with such a powerful feeling, and being told to calm down can deflate the rush that comes with feeling angry, which some people like. In fact, a couple of years ago, a producer for talk show The View called Bushman as a potential guest who would teach four angry women, the show's hosts, how best to vent. That would be the worst thing he could do, Bushman told the producer. The best way to deal with anger isn't to vent it or bottle it, he said, but address the emotion and then tone it down.
处理这样一种激烈的情绪,最好的方法是给它降降温,或许这一点与现在全球变暖的趋势背道而驰。劝说气头上的人冷静下来有助于释放发泄者的愤怒情绪,避免发泄者做出冲动的行为。事实上,在几年前,脱口秀节目《观点》的制作人曾有意邀请布西曼作为嘉宾,为该节目四位暴躁的女主持人传授发泄怒火的最佳方法。布西曼向这位制作人坦言,他不愿意这样做。他说,处理愤怒的最佳途径不是发泄也不是压抑,而是正确地疏导、缓和愤怒的情绪。
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