“自怜”在本质上是放自己一马。你更愿意用仁慈和理解的心态看待错误或失败——而不是严厉的批评或抵触心理。研究表明那些自我怜悯的人更幸福、更乐观、焦虑和沮丧也会更少,这并不令人惊讶。但有趣的是:这些人也更成功。我们很多人认为对自己应该严格些,这样才能表现的最好,但是结果说明这种想法大错特错。所以请记得人孰无过,要给自己休息的时间。
2. Remember the "Big Picture."
2.记得“大愿景”
Anything you need or want to do can be thought of in more than one way. For instance, "exercising" can be described in Big Picture terms, like "getting healthier" — the why of exercising — or it can be described in more concrete terms, like "running two miles" — the how of exercising. Thinking Big Picture about the work you do can be very energizing in the face of stress and challenge, because you are linking one particular, often small action to a greater meaning or purpose. So when staying that extra hour at work at the end of an exhausting day is thought of as "helping my career" rather than "answering emails for 60 more minutes," you'll be much more likely to want to stay put and work hard.
你做的每件事都不只有一种思考方法。比方说,“锻炼”如果往大方面想,可以是“变得更健康”(锻炼的原因)或者是更具体的“跑两英里”(如何锻炼)。当面对压力或挑战时想想“大愿景”能让你很有动力,因为你把一个具体的、往往是很小的行动联系到很大的意义或目的上。所以当你劳累一天后还要多做一小时工作时,想想“这对职业生涯有帮助”而不是“还要多回60分钟邮件”,这样你会更愿意加班并努力工作。
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