一些与伴侣增进感情的小秘诀_BEC初级作文

一些与伴侣增进感情的小秘诀

Still, there's a hidden and surprising danger in showing appreciation for your spouse. Do it too often and it might lose its positive impact. 'Appreciation is tied up with expectations,' Dr. Gordon says. 'The more you expect something, the less you appreciate it.' Her advice: Change it up. Bring your beloved coffee one morning; make a nightcap another day.

专家表示，除了庆祝欢乐时光之外，定期—比如每天—向伴侣表示感谢也至关重要。盖布尔称：“为了让两人的关系历久弥新，你需要努力地经营它。”

And what if you are the one who needs the extra love? 'If you want to see good behavior, model it,' says Paul Hokemeyer, a licensed marriage and family therapist in New York and Boca Raton, Fla. 'You need to set the standard you want to receive.'

当写作这篇专栏文章时，我向一些人询问了他们向伴侣表达关心的方法。我听到有些丈夫会为他们的妻子奉上床边咖啡、在寒冷的早晨帮她们热车并且把最后一块巧克力留给她们。而这些妻子则是那些每天早晨为丈夫准备早餐，向朋友们吹嘘自己的丈夫有多棒（并且让丈夫听到）的人。

To avoid feeling self-conscious, start each day with one small act of generosity, Dr. Hokemeyer says. Make the bed for her. Tuck a love note in his suitcase before a business trip. Mail a card or handwritten note to your spouse at home.

研究显示，这些小举动对感情具有重大影响。它们能够提升忠诚度。加州大学伯克利分校(University of California, Berkeley)人格和社会研究所(Institute of Personality and Social Research)的博士后埃米·戈登(Amie Gordon)表示：“对伴侣心怀感激会使你努力维系感情。”戈登曾对伴侣关系中的感激之情进行过研究。她称：“这些小举动有助于你认识到自己拥有的宝贵财富。”她还称，当伴侣中的一方表达感激之情时，良性循环会由此开启，伴侣中的另一方也会更加感恩、更加忠诚。