"The problem is that once that line is drawn you may have trouble getting your kid anywhere near it without a similar -- or larger -- payment in the future. "Understand, if doing X gets your kids Y, you're setting up a structure where that takes place," says Stuart Ritter, a certified financial planner with T. Rowe Price. That means it can be tough to produce the desired behavior without paying for it next time.
T. Rowe Price基金的认证理财规划师斯图尔特o里特表示:“问题在于,一旦你开了价,未来如果没有同样的甚至更多的钱,你可能无法说服孩子做任何事情。例如,如果做X能让孩子得到Y,家长其实是建立一个体系。”这意味着,如果下一次你不掏钱,便很难得到想要的结果。
What's the difference between a bribe and an incentive? Both are forms of negotiation. You give a little to get what you want, the child gives a little to do the same. The difference is that bribery usually happens in the crunch. For whatever reason, you feel your child's behavior must change immediately so you make an offer that you hadn't planned on making. Incentives are a little more planned. (In hindsight, my gym offer was more incentive than bribe.) You've thought about what sort of carrot might bring about the sort of behavioral change you're after, and you're prepared to make an offer to spur the change.
贿赂与激励之间有什么区别?两者均属于谈判的方式。你付出一点东西来获得自己想要的,孩子同样如此。两者的区别在于,贿赂通常发生在危机关头。不论是何缘故,你觉得孩子的行为必须立即改变,于是你报出一个自己没有多做考虑的价格。而激励则更有计划性。(事后想想,我付钱让孩子去健身房的做法,更像是激励,而不是贿赂。)你已经仔细考虑过用哪种“胡萝卜”可能让孩子按照你想要的方式改变行为,做好准备出价来刺激孩子做出改变。
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