So how can we get to stage five, and how can we maintain it?
那么怎样才能到达第五阶段,怎样维持一段关系?
One way is through Marathon Talking. Two people take turns talking for 48 hours. One talks for 24 hours while the other listens. Then they switch places.
方法之一就是通过马拉松式的聊天。两个人在48小时里轮流说话。一个人说24小时,另一个人听,然后另一个人说24小时,一个人听。
It sounds extreme. It is. And it works.
听起来很极端,没错,但也很管用。
The speaking partner can share whatever he or she wants -- life stories, memories, turning points, fears, hopes, goals. The topic doesn't matter because, about five or six hours in, when it seems as if everything has been said, some kind of magic happens where both partners stop struggling to be accepted and understood.
说话的一方可以分享任何他或她想说的:人生故事,回忆,转折点,恐惧,希望,目标。谈话主题并不重要,因为大约五六小时的时间,好像什么都已经说了,这时奇迹便发生了,两个人不再纠结,他们开始接受,开始理解彼此。
It sounds like a lot of work and perhaps impossible to manage. Actually, it's a gift – to listen devotedly to a loved one for 24 hours -- and then to share lovingly and unreservedly for 24 hours.
听起来很麻烦且也许不太可能。实际上,它是一件礼物——完全倾听另一半24小时,深情款款毫无保留地与另一半分享24小时。
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