结构分析:第1句是主题句,后接4句支持句。作者还是习惯性地追求长句。这点并没有什么不好。但是有一点要提醒大家:该长的长,该短的还得短啊!!!有时候,可以写的简洁一点的句子或者说没法写得长的句子,就写得短一点,没什么不好。雅思作文可没要求句句都要写长!!!而且硬组合起来的长句也并不好,要是再写错,岂不是赔了夫人又折兵啊!!!
Snacks and toys, tough(根据句意,应该是though) mainly designed for teens, do take one part of the on-sale information advertisements convey. Admittedly, all food producers expect a promising prospect of their products,(此处应改为;) they then will naturally exaggerate(它一般是及物动词!!!这里缺宾语) to a certain degree by planning creative notions and exuberant ads lines. But through those introductions, parents may acquire a better understanding of which one they are much more into. Take milking powders for example, if milking powders with famous brands are much more frequently chosen, babies, as we believe, are less likely to get hurt or even poisoned as they sometimes suffered before. (98words)
结构分析:第1句主题句就写得不够理想,造成一定的理解障碍!!!后面写了3句支持句,但是写得并不好,不论在意思上,还是句子结构与语法上都不理想!!!这就是硬写长句的后果啊!!!
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