常见的错误想法是:受欢迎的人总在谈论自己最新升职、快乐假期或热辣派对。偶尔听听有趣故事也还不错,但若一直听别人呱啦炫耀,多数人会感到厌烦抵触。更有效的办法是:真正对他人生活感兴趣,多让别人开口讲话。而且请记住:世上最美好的词就是自己的名字。所以,常称呼他人姓名,让他们觉得自己特别。
2. Be positive – but not too positive
积极乐观,但也别做过头
Think about people you’ve known who expect the worst from everyone and everything and aren’t shy about speaking up. Not much fun to be around, are they? This doesn’t mean you have to be constantly spreading false rays of sunshine. That’s nearly as annoying as eternal pessimism. Have a clear-eyed and honest attitude and people will come to value your opinions as trustworthy.
想想身边那些口无遮拦的家伙,总是扫人兴搅浑局,真没趣,是吧?你无须总是假装给点阳光就灿烂,这种做法和无休止的悲观一样惹人厌烦。保持镇定诚恳,别人自然会信赖你。
3. Be charitable to others
善待他人
Gossiping about friends and co-workers may gain you an audience, but it’s superficial and temporary. Those who indulge their pettier instincts trashing others aren’t the ones you want in your circle. Eventually even those people will realize that you’re just as likely to be talking about them in the same way and they’ll steer clear. It also translates as weakness and insecurity, trying to build yourself up by tearing others down. Take the high road and you’ll be seen as fair-minded.
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