Avoid extremes in autonomy. Don’t dominate, but don’t be a non-contributor either.
不要极端地把控话语权。不占主导地位,但也不要做完全被动的角色。
3.Share Secrets
分享秘密
Emotional, personal information exchange during first date conversation promotes powerful feelings of connection.
第一次约会交流感情、互相交换个人信息能大大促进感情的联系。
A psychologist at the State University of New York at Stony Brook, is interested in how people form romantic relationships, and he’s come up with an ingenious way of taking men and women who have never met before and making them feel close to one another. Given that he has just an hour or so to create the intimacy levels that typically take weeks, months, or years to form, he accelerated the getting-to-know-you process through a set of thirty-six questions crafted to take the participants rapidly from level one in McAdams’s system to level two.[/en]
纽约州立大学斯托尼布鲁克分校的一位心理学家对于人们是如何形成浪漫关系这方面的研究很感兴趣,他想出了一个巧妙的计策把从来没有见过面的男女让他们感觉彼此亲近。通常需要几周、几个月或几年的时间才能产生亲密感,而通过这一策略用一小时左右的时间就可以,他通过制定了一组问题,包括36个问题对参与者进行测试,就加速了美好感觉的产生过程,在麦克亚当斯的系统中,级别迅速从一级提升到二级。
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